Journal Entry- First Love

There have been few in my life, few that have awakened the desire from within to care, to love. My career has not often allowed the luxury to be with another. Duty, responsibilities always have taken precedence over my personal life.

Once, there was a fellow Imperial Officer. I was hunting in the hills of Naboo, on a training mission. I was leading new residents of my town out on a hunting mission to clear out some local Fambaa Packs. Often times these massive creatures would encroach on our city’s boarders. This was a perfect opportunity to help new residents practice their shooting, and scouting skills. Sending my pets to occupy the creatures, throwing Adhesive Mesh traps at them as they attacked, and knocking the creatures down with a well placed pistol whip to the ankle, made the hunt relatively danger free. We had become overwhelmed due to a resident not following orders and were making camp. Suddenly my proximity alarm went off and I readied my weapon to deal with the humanoid threat coming over the hill. It was then that I looked up and saw a woman, strong in statue, black hair flowing down over her shoulders. In her hands were a T21. Not a common weapon to see being wielded by a female. Curious I rode out to meet her. I recognized her as a rifleman in the Imperial Army, and we spoke. Friendly and confident we chatted for a short time before returning to my encampment. I offered for her to join and she soon was standing by my side as I barked orders to the squad, she picked off Fambaas charging an individual hunter. Suddenly one of the giant creatures turned its sights on us. I reached for a trap but soon realized I was out. I tried yelling to Slice but he was busy helping a resident finish off a struggling Fambaa. I turned to her about to suggest we move, when she raised her rifle and brought down the creature before it was even within range of my pistol. I looked at her, searching for an answer to her calm, and surprising strength. She looked into my eyes with those green eyes of her, tilted her head to the side and smiled. Strength and beauty, a rare combination. I saw her from time to time as our paths crossed in both Theed and out in the woods. We both enjoyed the outdoors, and even spent a few evenings on hunts together, just the two of us.
Enjoying our time in the woods, I decided it was time we spent some away from the hunt. I invited her to dinner at my house and hired two friends to play music and dance as we ate and chatted. I picked her up at her house to be shocked at the sight before me. No longer were my eyes taking in the sight of a warrior hoisting around a high powered rifle. What I saw looking down at me from her balcony framed by the setting sun’s light, shamed me…For I felt as if I was not even worthy of being in her presence. I have fought numerous battles against rebels against insurmountable odds, yet for once I was uncertain, and even, slightly afraid. New feelings were manifesting in the hard nosed Imperial Officer, my walls of strength were being torn down by this vision of soft innocence. Knowing the balance to this soft side, made her that much more engaging. I walked up to her and, without words, offered my hand at her doorstep to guide her down the front steps and a short block away to my house. We exchanged pleasantries along the way. I complemented her on her dress, knowing my simple words did no justice to the sight before me. Once we arrive at my house, she was shocked to see two others there. The entertainers were a surprise. She entered my house for the first time. Looking around like a curious animal, she absorbed the sights of my living room, and hunting collection. Near the base of the stairs a simple glass table was set with food for two. The musician positioned himself on the stairs, the dancer began to sway softly to his music on the floor. My eyes never left the creature ahead of me dressed in her gray and black elegant dress. She asked questions of my past, my childhood, my time as mayor. She was most fascinated that I would have the time to be mayor of a city, yet, still be available to help the young resident or new crafter. She had spent time in Mos Eisley, helping farmers recently landed get their feet on the ground. I believe we have a kindred spirit in this. Whether it is to spread the goodwill and influence of the empire, or merely a way for us to pay penance for the death we have caused, helping others has always been a part of our lives. I suppose that is why I became a mayor, and she the Headmistress of her guild. At the evening’s conclusion, we parted with a peck on the cheek. I returned to my house to clean up, looking every so often at the empty chair in which she once sat. It was then, that I decided, love would have to come before duty this one time.

Frequenting cantinas, I had several friends in the entertainment business. One such friend, a giant wookie by the name of Grud, asked me if I would officiate his wedding ceremony at the Lake Retreat. I readily accepted. Apparently there are benefits to being a master politician after all. He said that a tailor of his would provide clothes and to tell me if I will be bringing a date. The next time I saw my hunting partner, she greeted me with a sly smile, something a little different behind those eyes of hers. I could not quite see it but I knew I had to find out. The wedding would be the time. I asked her if she would care too attend and what her dress size was, laughing at the confused look upon her face. On the day of the event I met her in Eden’s Grief, the current city where we separately reside. We took a shuttle to the Lake Retreat and quickly met up with the tailor. I was given an outfitting befitting royalty: gold cloth trimmed in a fine white. She emerged from changing more radiant than ever. We were introduced to many. Never of us being one for big groups, we politely spoke with those around us. During the ceremony it was difficult for me to focus on the task at hand, my eyes shifting to her standing patiently to the side. She seemed to be shifting around uneasily. She had to have known that there were other eyes upon her figure besides mine. As soon as the ceremony was concluded, she walked quickly to my side and smiled. She took my hand into hers and looked at me, a slight gleam in her eye. She commented on what a beautiful ceremony it was. Soon after the congratulations to the new bride and groom were concluded, Grud announced that the guests were invited into the cantina for the reception, but that first, there was an announcement. He stepped aside and motioned to me…I glanced at her quickly and caught her head turning to mine, masked with confusion. I stepped around and stood in front of her. I spoke of the earlier times in which we barely knew each other, and the times we stood side by side fighting in the wild. She looked into my eyes with a certain bit of uncertainty as to what was about to happen. A noticed a small grin break on her face, along with a single tear forming at her eye. I kneeled before her and asked her for her hand in marriage. She reached her hand out to pull me to my feet and whispered the words, “Yes, of course…” The crowd cheered for us, as we bounded into the cantina with the rest of the guests. Side by side, hand in hand.
We were soon married in Eden’s Grief. A good friend, Kasek Zon officiated. I quickly moved into her house, moving my office in as well. It was a blissful time; one which I think back on regularly. We had a child, Avios, before we were married and continue to play a role in his life. Letting this creature go back to the wild may have been the single most critical mistake of my life. I never should have let her go.