Ever Changing Fate-SWG

Final Chapter Part I

2011-10-14T00:02:00.000-05:00

“Prisoner XF228, step forward. Continue to MedBay 7 for final workup for release.”

From the line of 15 shabby humanoids in drab jumpsuits stepped a man with hard eyes. He shifted his gaze from the guards to his fellow prisoners, offering them a passing nod as he moved on. The muscles in his left arm worked at clenching and releasing a fist that was not there, similar to what one might call a nervous tick if they didn’t know the man. Those that did however knew this was a sign that deep within the man laid enough raw rage to embolden a platoon of non-clone soldiers, and it was threatening to explode.

He walked, standing up taller than most of the guards. They took years of his life away in mere months with the endless questions, the tests, and of course, the punishments. Scarred and beaten, they quickly found that he either knew nothing or they did not have the means to break him. Usually after the removal of two digits, a prisoner finds they are unable to talk fast enough to tell everything. They took all 5 digits and the stub of a hand that remained, slowly, methodically. During all this his eyes never left his tormentors. He never flinched, he never cried out. What they wanted from him he was never quite sure. Perhaps it was the destruction and disappearance of the rebel attachment he was fighting for. Perhaps it was the imperial colors adorning his walls and ship hanger.

The man entered the medical bay and the med droid began his cursory scan. A human med tech walked in reading a chart. Her deep pink hair was almost as shocking as her form. A quick glance and the technician tossed a datachip to the man that had been concealed in her datapad. Without so much as a blink, the chip was caught with the man’s good hand and inserted into the medical droid. From under the exam table the woman picked up a case, unlocked it, and placed it on the equipment table before turning to leave. With a quick glance over her shoulder she whispered, “Don’t be home late, brother.”

The med droid rebooted and began to complete its new instructions. From the case it extracted an advanced prosthetic model not used on prisoners. It worked quickly attaching the hand on the wounded prisoner. A series of injections would have to suffice instead of a bacta tank. This prisoner’s time was running out. Finally the droid indicated it was complete. The prisoner flexed the hand into a fist.

“But, sir, you must test each finger individually so I may make adjustments.”

The prisoner looked up at the droid with a smirk before putting the new fist through the droid’s cranial unit.

“This will have to do.”

Security was truly lax. Threat of escape into the jungles of Dathomir was not a viable risk so external monitoring was scant. The perimeter fences were used to keep people in as much as they were used to keep other things in the jungles out. One such creature, a Rancor of immense size had been seen stalking the fence line for the last few days. No one believes that the corpse of a malkoc that the rancor threw at the fence had anything to do with the lab technician that went missing, the 7 guards that were found dead, and the one medical droid that was destroyed. It appears someone escaped but cell count shows all prisoners accounted for. While it is possible a prisoner could have escaped, they certainly wouldn’t have slowed down their egress enough to hack the datanet. The official paperwork stated the perimeter fence was breached and unknown predators entered the compound and gained entry to the prison medical unit. The carnage certainly pointed to a predator from the jungles and extensive Tanray tracks were found. While not being native to Dathomir it is believed the Tanray was a Nightsister companion that had been turned loose and reverted to a feral state.

Seven clicks northeast of the compound the prisoner knelt down below a tie bomber and rubbed behind the ear of a Razor Cat. With a whistle he stood up and the Razor Cat went running into the ship, followed closely by a Tanray that slipped out of the woods. A loud rumbling and the breaking of trees made the Tanray stop and look back briefly. A Rancor broke through the tree line and charged the prisoner. Stopping short the Rancor bent down low and bellowed a loud rumble of anger at the man.

“I am sorry my friend. This is your home now. You cannot follow me anymore. I have but a few things to finish before my final journey.”

The rancor stood up straight and roared into the sky as if the man’s words wounded him. Looking down at the man once more, it slowly turned around and walked back to the trees. The Rancor slowly shuffled away as if his will to go on was sapped. The man watched him disappear then turned for the shuttle with tears running down his face. He did not know how he was going to stomach releasing all of his companions back into their natural habitat. Only the loss of three people have brought tears to this man’s face. He knows each and every one of the creatures he will have to release will do the same.

The man walks up the ramp into the ship. The Tanray stood on its hind legs and looked at the man questioningly.

“No my friend, not yet, I still need your help. Droid, set a course for Naboo, drop down on the outskirts of Keren.”

The man held his new prosthetic hand at the snout of the Tanray. It sniffed briefly and cocked its head to the side seemingly confused.

“I know old friend, I know. Just a little more time left. I need your help your find her. Once I do…I don’t know what will happen.”

Fallen Devil

2011-06-21T13:44:00.001-05:00

There is a reason Eleska puts her extensive medical knowledge to use in a private lab versus a public medical center. Her bedside manner is atrocious, and it is undoubtedly being multiplied by the fact that once again, she has to stitch up her brother. What’s worse, I can smell a new familiar scent. I tried to smile. I could hear the mumbling of their conversation via the vibrations of the bacta. Some people who have never had the occasion to be repaired like this do not understand the heightened senses one can sometimes experience. The mild concussion didn’t knock me out. It was the seeping of the atmosphere escaping my damaged ship and the punctured lung that made me pass out upon reentry. With the foresight to program my autopilot my ship took us to Eleska’s lab on Lok. I don’t know how she does it as small as she is but she always manages to pull me into the lab and the bacta tank.

Their voices became raised and I could hear agitation in their conversation. It was time to get out of here. I don’t want them fighting. Suddenly things went cold. Except for….a warmth along my side…and something else, soft, it was holding me. Her, I could smell her, how did she know I was hurt? Why is she at Eleska’s lab? I relaxed and tried to smile but the muscles wouldn’t respond.
Tonight they will. If all else fails, I know she will still be in my arms.

Captured Devil

2011-06-16T13:46:00.001-05:00

He held his saber a little too close to the doctor’s throat, I could see the skin turn bright red at the proximity of the heat. I didn’t say a word, I just gazed down upon my prey, his eyes wide with fear, sweat running down his brow. I held a datapad to his face, forcing him to watch and listen to the bio-report.

“Scan complete. Subject: Female, Twi’lek, Purple pigmentation of skin, exact age unknown. Genetic manipulation discovered on the 15th chromosome. Gene location is 234.156. Known mapping indicates this gene is responsible for sex drive and physical attachment to another based for the single basic purpose of self-pleasure.”

My eyes watched his as they shifted to utter horor and the realization of what he was seeing. “I have her now, and I will fix what you have done to your own flesh and blood. During these last few breaths of yours consider her fate. You may have done what you did to save her but what will her fate be when I strip away the chains you bound her with?”

“Maybe she will fall in love with an Imperial and turn traitor to your cause doctor,” Zoidberg said with a smirk at his joke. I looked at him sternly so the good doctor would not see me trying to hide a grin.

“So what do we do with you now doctor? I know of a lab on Dathomir that is just itching for new subjects. Maybe you would like to spend some time on the other side of the cage for a change.” Zoidberg chuckled. “I got him Zoidberg, I’ll deliver him personally and speak with his new hosts…in great detail of my expectations.

“Very well Maxell, and remember our deal.” Zoidberg said as he released the doctor. “Help them, turn them into the warriors they can be, my time with them has come and gone. I can do no more.”

I nodded as my mind briefly spun to the task before me. New battalion, new troopers, different side, different day.

I dragged the doctor to the shuttle and set the course for our destination.

“That, that isn’t the course for Dathomir, where are you taking me?”

“None of your concern, yet…” The doctor passed out due to fear and his extreem exhaustion. We soon landed and I ordered one of my droids to carry him inside where I left him sitting upon a divan. I placed a datapad on the table next to him with a simple message.

I could never kill the father of the woman I love no matter the depravity and type of being he is. You are to stay here for the remainder of your life or until I see fit to release you. Do not venture outside. There are a multitude of well trained beasts guarding your house and I can assure you, they are all very very hungry. I have provided the necessities plus a tech lab for you to continue work. You will have access to computers only, no biologicals. Your soulless hands will never lay upon a living creature again.

New Day, New Life

2011-06-15T14:30:00.000-05:00

I quietly slipped out of bed and walked downstairs. Little Max came bounding around the corner to me and played his best game of cute so I would feed him…Hmmm I wonder what she feeds him. I heard the nails of a claw scratching on the hard floor from around the corner. As quiet and dark as the knight, my Tanray peeked his head around the corner, looking for the morsel of breakfast the rest of us call Little Max. I made eye contact with his four hours and smirked, shaking my head no. With an almost human nod, he turned around the corner on the hunt for different prey. I hope my shoes are hidden away safely.

I walked into her kitchen and made breakfast, careful to remain quiet. I put a large portion of sliced fruit, avian eggs and toast in the ref’er so she could reheat when she woke up. I glanced over my shoulder to be sure she was not awake before I put a small plate of eggs on the ground for Little Max to eat. I leaned against the countertop nibbling on my toast and watched him eat. Always my creatures were built for utilitarian use, large beasts capable of vicious combat. I never used them as fodder and spent as much time mending them on the battlefield as I do myself, but still…I wondered if I was wrong to use the creatures to facilitate my survival. Little Max served no purpose besides to make the one I love happy. Is that enough? With a pang of guilt I whistled softly for my Tanray. His head popped around the other corner to the kitchen. I held my hand out so he could approach me and slowly moved my hand to scratch behind his ears. Like a feline he leaned into my hand wanting more. His eyes darted to Little Max and the plate of eggs. “Share.” The Tanray slinked over and nudged Little Max so he could access the plate too. Little Max growled and jumped on the Tanray’s back in what must have been the only way it knew to fight. The Tanray looked up briefly, then went back to eating. Little Max stood atop him and growled then became silent. He sniffed and circled then laid down on his broad warm back. I shook my head as I tossed my crust onto their plate and left to my room to pull on my flight suit.

I passed the stairs up to her room and glanced up, hungry to wake her with my body, but thought better of it. She needs to sleep and I cannot shirk my duties or else unfamiliar eyes may look in our direction and wonder why an Imperial Agent is living with, and sleeping with a Rebel.

Incident Report BB-47

2011-06-13T22:46:00.000-05:00

Incident Report BB-47

Local Incursion into Patrol Vector

Results: Imperial Patrol Terminated

Investigation Submitted by: Commander Maxell Snow
Results: At 0130 hours an Imperial patrol was sent to investigate the reported intrusion of a known rebel sympathizer into Oasis Outpost BB-106 on Tatooine, Southern Hemisphere. At 0200 hours the patrol failed to check in via comms and an additional sqad was sent to investigate. Thy recovered the corpses of all three stormtroopers. Investigation of their helmets indicates a sniper shot to the head. Ballistics test confirm the caliber rifle shell was identical to the ones found in native Tusken Rifles. Bodies were badly maimed, remains point to native carrion species. Bantha tracks leading away from the bodies further confirm Tuskens were responsible. It is assumed rebel sympathizer was eliminated or captured as well. Further investigation unnecessary.

Eleska Pt. I

2011-06-07T23:44:00.000-05:00

Eleska

As usual, the door slams shaking my desk and disrupting my concentration. That man is as infuriating as any, except with this one, I am forced to endure.

“Did you bring it like I asked?”

“Of course I did, and I brought a little something extra for you.” I turned to him, my curiosity piqued. In his hand he held a creature’s egg.

“What is it?”

“Let’s go to your lab and find out, it should be about ready to hatch. I just got it from the bioengineer.”

“You what? You bought an egg from someone else? When I am surrounded by all of this?”

“Eleska, relax. You haven’t seen one of these yet. Not only that along with the egg, I learned how to create it from the doctor.” I had to struggle to hide my emotions. He knows exactly what buttons to push, exactly how to turn me into a giddy little girl. He annoys me sometimes.

Once in the lab he gently set the egg down under the heating element. The egg seemed to vibrate a bit and shift around as if it was trying to roll off. He steadied the egg with a gently hand and looked up into my eyes.

“Eleska I need your help. I need you to analyze this bio readout. It is from a Twi’lek. She has been…modified.”

“Your work?” he shook his head a little too quickly and a little too hard, betraying his emotions. I glanced at the egg seeing it was well cared for.

“Fine, but don’t make me miss this.”

“I promise I won’t, I will call at the first sign of it hatching.”

I flipped the datacard in my fingers, curious at who this was and why he is so interested in her. This is a bit out of character for him. I sat at my desk and inserted the chip. A rendering of the genetic structure lit the screen before my eyes, highlighting the anomalies. Curious, the location of the markers seemed familiar…something from many years ago, who was his name…that genetics lab on Corellia…internship…he hit on me…constantly…dirty old man…Dom….Dommer…No, it hit me finally….Tag Domn’r.

“Hey!! I got it, Dr. Tag Domnr. He was a professor I had for an internship on Corellia. He is stationed at Moenia, did you hear me? Maxell?”

I rushed back into the room, thinking I was missing the egg hatching. Instead I was greeted by his eyes, boring through me, that look on his face…the one you can’t really tell if he is in deep concentration, or is simply on the verge of loosing control. It always gave me the shivers.

Instead of looking past me he looked right into my eyes, “Can you generate a device that will eliminate the effects of the alterations?”

“I should be able too. When do you need it by?”

“I’ll be back in a day, have it ready.”

“But, Maxell the materials for something like that…this is a biolab, not an engineering workroom.”

“Call Avios, get him to help you. Watch the egg, I will be back for it too”

“Maxell, please, be careful.”

He didn’t even break his stride as he left. Brothers…infuriating…

Rebirth

2011-05-31T23:38:00.001-05:00

I awoke with a start, finding the naked thigh of a Twi’lek draped across my leg. At one point of my life I may have been ashamed to recognize that this was not an uncommon occurrence. Years of war and years of witnessing friends and loved ones torn apart before your eyes tends to erode honor and decency. Solace is often found in between the thighs of a woman. This one…was different.

I ran the back of my hand across her forehead gently so as to not wake her. A tender touch, one she is not used to receiving, and one I have not desired to share with anyone else for a long time. Something was wrong. Her flesh was ice cold, breathing now that I looked beyond the swell of her chest was shallow and slow. She was dying.

As quickly as I had laid her down in my bed the night before I lifted her. cradled in my arms. I rushed down two lifts, across the main concourse to the medical bay. I gently placed her upon and examination table and fired up the droid.

“Full body scan down to the cellular level. Search for any anomalies: structural or genetic. Access Imperial records, download basic Twi’lek physiology and known pathogens. Cross reference any anomalies found with known diseases.” The medical droid attempted an off balance salute. I do not know why my droids started doing this. It was not into their protocol programming, but it did begin shortly after my Narglatch used an R2 unit as a toy…

The monotone voice responded after a few minutes, “Scan complete. Genetic manipulation discovered on the 15th chromosome. Gene location is 234.156. Known mapping indicates this gene is responsible for sex drive and physical attachment to another based for the single basic purpose of self-pleasure.” My heart sank. She was an engineered pleasure girl and I had fallen into her trap only the night before.

A hand suddenly grasped mine tightly and I pulled my sidearm without thinking. I looked down, into her green eyes. They welled with tears and pleaded with me, “Maxell, please, help me. The droid is right but last night wasn’t…I need help, please take me home.” I placed a gentle hand on her forehead, running the palm down her face, urging her to close her eyes and relax.

As quickly as I found myself lost in something long forgotten the night before, I returned to what I know best. Leaving the medical bay I returned to the ante chamber to the bridge where my Mandalorian armor waited. Under this, I was shielded from the world. When I remove it, I get hurt in more ways than one. Not this time. I will fix this and things will be different. She may not be mine in the end, but at least she will be free, and someone will be dead for what they have done.

The Next Chapter

2009-02-24T13:31:00.000-06:00

Some people search for power, others for money. I find myself again sitting in a dark corner of a nameless cantina in an outlying settlement on Tatooine, trying to figure out what I am searching for. My contact comes in with a thin coat of the planet’s sand on her armor. She scans the room before removing her helmet; smart, very smart but not quite smart enough. As she barked orders for a drink there was a blink of movement behind her, someone had slipped in the cantina behind her. Clearly this Twi’lik was being followed and by the looks of the man, in a bit of danger. I watched her movements with a modicum of curiosity. A Twi’lik is normally of no interest. Usually you find them bending a body wrapped in little clothing to the jeers and gawking of men. However this Twi’lik entered with battle armor on and a curious heavy weapon. The small bandolier of syringes at her hip usually intended for creatures further piqued my interest.

My eyes followed her threat as he circled around the edge of the room. I nodded to the Twi’lik and she smiled, glad to know she had found me finally. She still had not seen the man, nor the human female at the end of the bar getting up to go talk to him. Good, she should provide an adequate distraction so we may complete our business. I kicked a chair away from the table so she could sit as she approached me. I made a motion for her to be quiet as she sat and I pointed to the bench next to me where my crystal snake was curled up.

Her hand went to her mouth in surprise and whispers, “Can I pet him?”

I nodded, “Of course, we have been out in the desert training a bit so he is worn out and sleeping. He enjoys this planet quite a bit. It also seems he enjoys…training as well.”

She chuckled with a knowing smirk, “I got a slice hound not too long ago; he is outside waiting. Although he is a bit young I have been trying to push the training.”

I smiled at her as she took a sip of her drink while my eyes glanced to her pursuer and the young woman who suddenly seemed so interested in him. From his behavior, he is clearly not interested in what she is offering. Like any girl in a far off cantina, she does not seem interested in taking no for an answer.

I slid the package to the Twi’lik as she pulled out her datapad and completed the bank transfer. In turn, my datapad beeped indicated the received funds. Opening the corner of the small package a knowing smirk broke across her face.

“These are hard to find, how did you happen to come across so many?” she asked as her attention barely diverted away from what laid in her hands. With her attention focused on the package I quickly checked on the man that followed her in. Poor amateur is still letting himself be distracted by the little bargirl. With this glance though, I noticed something new about the girl. Her loose pants had slipped down to reveal the hilt of a blade at her hip. Curious, this girl may not be as she appears as well.

My eyes shifted back to my customer and I smiled to her, “Those that find things for me only do so because I respect their anonymity and protect them from certain, Imperial inquiries.”

Her eyes moved up to meet mine at my last comment, “Something told me you were something beyond what your appearance said you were. Your demand of anonymity and location were the first clues. The snake only confirmed it. Those are hard to tame and not loose a limb. In fact I cannot remember the last time I have seen one controlled so well.” Sliding a datachip over she continued, “Contact us, maybe someone in your line of work could be of some use to us, and we pay very well. We are in need of a merchant to take charge of our crafters’ division”

This piqued my interest but I could not stifle the chuckle. I opened my jacket so she could see the thermal grenades and custom DX2. “Do you think I look like a merchant? My leading days are over, and I have always had a bit of a…deficiency in taking orders.”

“Don’t concern yourself with that. Your skills would definitely be of use. Contact us; we have an outpost forming on Naboo. I think you are from there originally. Might be nice to return home no and again?”

“Doing homework on me already?”

“I would be stupid not to follow you out this desolate place without poking around the Imperial databanks a bit. You have quite the curious service record. All those years and only rated a private?”

“I had a run-in with a general awhile back.”

“Is he still alive?”

“For now.”

She smiled and stood up, cradling her package with her arm. My eyes darted to the man who missed the beginning of her egress. I stood up as she did and grabbing her arm pulling her to me. Whispering in her ear I told her of the man and to exit the back way. Without speaking she motioned for her gear and left quickly. The man turned just as she disappeared behind the door. Pushing the barmaid off of his lap he stood and began to run towards in order to follow the Twilik. The poor girl was dazed but got up and motioned to the bartender. He tossed an old EE3 carbine to her and she turn towards the running man. He never saw my foot sticking out to trip him. His momentum sent him sprawling. The bargirl with the old carbine was on him in a flash, its muzzle pointed at the back of his head. By the hair she pulled him up and led him out the back. Curiosity made me follow. As I exited I was greeted by the blinding sun of Tatooine and a cussing girl on her back, bleeding from the temple, throwing the apparently worthless EE3 away. Her mark running as fast as he could, undoubtedly forgetting he had someone to kill and only concerned with his own life. With a click of my tongue and a nod my snake flashed past us towards the man. Thinking his enemy was behind him and unarmed he never looked back to see the threat speeding towards him. Most would not be able to recognize the shimmer across the sand as that of a crystal snake, even in this high light. Turning behind him may not have mattered. In a blink the snake was upon him, sinking his fangs into the fleshy calf of the man causing him to stumble. His scream was muffled by a mouthful of sand.

The girl watched as the snake finished what she could not. I extended a hand to help her up. Her young eyes looked at mine with a mixture of uncertainty and thanks. I reached in my pack and extended a laser carbine I had acquired from a Jabba pirate who disagreed with me a few days ago.

“Take this and forget about that piece of trash in the sand.” She took it as I approached her, our faces inches from one another. She held my gaze with a curious sense of strength and did not back away or cower. I extended my hands to her waist and reached inside her waistband grabbing the hilt of her blade and rotated the scabbard so it would be concealed better. “Carry this here from now on and you will not find yourself flashing your blade in bars anymore.” She did not even flinch at the intrusion. I turned sending a signal with my mouth to my snake to return and leave his catch alone.

“Wait, um, where are you going?”

“Why do you care?”

“I can help you, I am better than this.”

“At what, being a bounty hunter?”

Her face turned angry, “You can teach me and I can help, I will not be in your way.”

My hand went to my pocket and played with the datachip the Twi’lik had given me about her organization, “Hm, perhaps, perhaps you can help. Have you ever traveled to Naboo?”

Personal Entry-Winds Swirling

2005-05-01T16:37:00.000-05:00

In a corner of the village I sit, helping when I can but mostly...watching. In and out go travellers of all types: hunters, soldiers, mercenaries, and the occaisional entertainer. All of these beings travel to this place in hopes of grasping a bit of fleeting glory through the Force. They travel here to hone their skills in hopes of becoming stronger, stronger so they may do what they wish without answering to others.

I resent them all. In the Force they seek power. In the Force I seek peace. Hopefully, through this peace, I will be able to help end this war, and the trauma we are inflicting upon our galaxy, and each other. Too many have fallen at the hands of blind hatred. The image of Kimbrya leaving and becoming one with the Force is forever etched in my mind. The cause of her death: orders from the Emperor, to investigate the Temple. I know Deomo was following his orders, I know, at that time, that was all he was able to do. I hope after his battle with the pendant, he will become more, for Meela...Colonel Cauil on the other hand, used trust and faith to manipulate us and almost kill me. His hands are dirty with the blood of Kimbrya as well. I will see to it that they are cleansed.

I worry how I will leave the village. Even in my own musings, I can see how easily my words slip to those of hatred and anger. For my sake, and those I love, I hope the correct path is set before me to see. I am trying Scarlet. Please believe I am trying my best, for us, for our life, and our future. Help those we love: Avios, Deomo, and Ebe..and all our friends that have been of help. Please..be strong for me.

Personal Entry- Loose Ends

2005-04-28T10:33:00.000-05:00

Before me, they both stood. Worry consumed their eyes, I could see their gaze shift to each other every so often as they searched for what was happening. It was time. Time for me to take the next step in my life.

Ever since I injured Scarlet and the…schism…the split within, I have not been well. Luckily, I was able to recognize the anger consuming me from within and, apparently, subconsciously, I was able to wall it off. Only during times of extreme stress or violence, did it break out. These were becoming more and more frequent. I was quickly loosing control. The strain on my body, whenever I returned to a calmer state was becoming too much. Several days at a time, I would be bed-ridden. This condition is not one which an Imperial Officer can have during a war, and survive. Too many people are dependent upon me, I cannot fail them, I will not fail them.

I hope that they will be strong for me, for themselves, and each other. To see the only two loves of my life standing side by side, without a knife in the hand waiting for the other…concern consuming their face, worry filling their eyes…It pained me to part. A shiver went through my body as I felt waves of fear radiate from both of them. It is my hope that I have ensured both of their safety. I worry for both of them. Scarlet: powerful, yet innocent and headstrong. She is not careless, but she needs help from time to time, someone to lean on. With my departure and Deomo’s battle, there are not many left that I trust. Ebe is one of the few. With only a word, she will do what I need her to, no money is necessary, no coercing. Others, I still trust, but not as explicitly as my ex wife. Commander Carrick strikes me as an honorable Imperial Officer, he will do his duty, but he will do what is right. I know what I ask of him is not easy. To harbor a rebel within his ranks. The 1,000,000 credits should facilitate the paperwork and turn the necessary heads the other way. I will owe him significantly.

Personal Entry- Last Days

2005-04-18T13:31:00.000-05:00

It was worrisome to watch. She fought with anger and vengeance on her mind. The voices bid she take revenge for their deaths. Scarlet has not fully recovered from her ordeal with Meela, her battle skills are rusty. That compounded with her lack of focus, found us soon overwhelmed in the bowels of Lord Nyax’s compound. There was little I could do. It took all my effort to keep up with her, to keep her on her feet as she fought the misled followers with all of her strength. We fell. Shot down by Lord Nyax himself. He was gracious enough to allow the cloning bots to our bodies. With a bow and a smirk, he turned as they swiftly carried us away.

I am glad to have had the chance to fight, side by side with Scarlet before I began my…journey. It opened my eyes to what must be done in my absence. Someone must carry on and ensure she finishes what she started with her training. She will need the skills, as I will soon not be able to stand by her side. With Deomo being an unknown, I cannot count on his return either. I will ensure she has a trainer, some one to keep an eye on her, and ensure she puts forth the necessary effort to master her fighting techniques.

I hope she also refocuses her efforts into the temple. The anger and vengeance was not something I have seen from Scarlet before, even when she was deep in the feral. I would imagine the weakness could be from many things…hormonal imbalance after carrying Meela, The vulnerability at Lord Nyax’s…even I felt the voices…

Focus my love, focus and strength. You will need both if you are to have a chance during the upcoming weeks. You will need to be strong for all of us: me, Meela, Deomo, the Temple…I hope, no…I pray that some day you will be able to follow me to where I must go. Until that day…

Personal Entry- Fate's End Part II

2005-04-14T16:25:00.000-05:00

Around she spun, as graceful as a shadow dancing across the landscape…A simple Imperial private, taking a respite from the war to toy with some hearts in the cantina. An evil permeated her, a darkness…she bent her body, swaying to the music, her piercing eyes looking at her simple-minded prey. Foolish men…so weak of mind…She will pick one out: one to take home, and feed upon. A lifestyle I have not come across through my travels, but my research indicates she is infected with the strain. No wonder the empire has recruited her. The bloodlust in an agent is a powerful tool. While I relish in it, she feeds upon it. Potome is a force to be reckoned with. She could prove to be very useful. I still have some scores to settle.

My thoughts were interrupted by the crass intrusion of a squad of Imperials on patrol, trying to ferret out rebels. One approached a known rebel sympathizer with whom I have become acquainted with. He threatened her and soon realized he was on the ground. He never saw the backhand coming that struck him so hard, he was dropped to his knees. I flashed my credentials to him and he apologized profusely. Soon another squad entered. Odd, a Colonel on patrol. Carrick approached me and introduced himself. He is the leader of a platoon of grunts and pilots with a call sign of TIE. He seemed very honorable, unusual in an Imperial Commander where usually the highest bidder wins. My thoughts again returned to loose ends I needed to…tie off…Perhaps TIE could assist me as well. We will see.

Why are my thoughts consumed by the end game? Why am I suddenly focused on all events left unfinished? Perhaps I have come to realize it is time. I know what I must do. Most of my time has been split between doing my job and helping those I love. Now, it is time to help myself. 72 hours straight of studying an intensive medical course series, has earned me the classification of Master Surgeon. I need to focus my efforts on solving this schism once and for all. Medical knowledge will not be enough, I know this now. My studies will have to be taken elsewhere. To some other place…A place separated form all others…from those I love…

Personal Entry- Fate's End Part I

2005-04-12T17:01:00.000-05:00

I have discovered what I have become, or rather, what I have always been. My bloodlust and desire to inflict pain was always masked by my innate desire to help those that cannot help themselves, and to also protect those dear to me. The shame of my recent failures caused a schism within. The dark desires: the hate, the shame, the desire to witness death at my own hand, were walled off, only to be seen when provoked. I began to record my comm. communications with my business associates, and those less savory. Although Tempestia is, for all intents and purposes, a mercenary, she is one in which I hold in high regard. During the recorded conversation I heard a distinct change in my voice. It was not me, yet…it was…I snapped on her, my words hitting my ears again brought forth a furry that brought me to my knees. So this is what Scarlet and Ebe have been worried about. This is why they want me to go to a medic. But who can help me? An Imperial Doctor? Unlikely…if it were not for the manipulation of records, I would surely be a candidate for the cloning campaign for stormtroopers. With the human intellect combined with the hint of Zabrak feral blood…Rebel Doctors? Regardless of what Scarlet may be able to provide, I doubt they would let an Imperial Officer loose so freely after treating him. I do not blame them. We are at war.

What then? Who can help me? Where can I turn? I do not think I can live like this…with this split in my mind, this constant battle, the constant turmoil. Who will win? What will be left of me once the battle is over?

Personal Entry- Love Revisited

2005-03-31T13:15:00.000-06:00

Something is going on that I cannot quite explain. Scarlet seems worried, almost frightened of me. I am over-joyed to see her yet she is fretting about something. Yesterday was a great day. Scarlet came to my house in Hendola as I was finishing my bath. I wonder what the red hue to the water is from? Perhaps my fountain has developed rust in places…I will have to get this cleaned. It was odd, she ran out as if she were intruding. Intruding in my house? Maybe she is not used to being out and about yet. How quickly she forgets *smile*

I ASKED HER TO STAY AWAY. SHE IGNORED AND HAD TO POKE. SHE WILL BE POKED BACK, WE ARE NOT READY YET. THE PAIN AND HATE IS CONTAINED. BE CONTENT WITH WHAT IS LEFT. YOU DO NOT WANT TO KNOW ME. FEEL FORTUNATE THAT I DO NOT WANT MY SELF TO BE KNOWN.

I was able to show Scarlet my Aurilian Plants. She is the only other person besides myself and Avios that have witnessed their growth. She commented on my hall being a bit clinical, she said it was nice, but very Imperial. *grin* Of course it is…with such a strong Imperial presence in the area the Empire will never give the Temple a second thought. She wandered downstairs and peeked in some of my storage containers. I had to chuckle as she turned around with a shocked look and asked what I was going to do with all of this? Start my own city? *laugh* Never would I take that monster on my shoulder again…

Personal Entry- Crossroads??

2005-03-29T16:09:00.000-06:00

Lately I find the time, desire, or motivation to submit entries to this journal lacking. Too much is happening right now in my life that sitting and writing just does not seem like an appropriate priority. I decided to fight my way up the ranks like any other grunt in Imperial Navy. I have gone from Sergeant to Warrant Officer, 2nd Class in a matter of weeks. It seems the higher command appreciates the carnage one can provide. Frankly, I appreciate the peace that creating such carnage provides me. No longer are my thoughts consumed by my failures. The more I think on it, I come to realize that Scarlet was only the most recent one in a long line of debacles. Perhaps I should just stay out of peoples’ lives.

First there was Ebe. She accidentally became pregnant, then unbeknownst to us, our child was taken. We recovered the child, but the wake of destruction that my rage left behind will surely catch up to me at some point. Ebe and I crossed paths much later, and fell in love again. My duty to that godforsaken city pulled me from my duties as a husband and I lost her.

Then Mystyn came into my life. She was a doctor in the city who, as it turns out, was a slave, still being persecuted. One aspect of the Empire I do not agree with is slavery. A hunting party was formed and we quickly, and repeatedly sent her tormentors to the cloner. Soon after, she was struck down with a childhood ailment. We were never able to find a cure. I did everything within my power to save her, but it was all for naught.

Gods, and now Scarlet. I cannot imagine two souls any more different than we are. Yet, I am drawn to her in a way I thought was impossible. Recalling how I first met her…a small huddled child of a woman, Kimbrya was being held in Imperial custody. There was something about this woman, there was a strength about her…It was through her that I met Scarlet…a wild animal of a woman: young in heart but old in mind and spirit. I love that about her. She has helped me grow as much as I have helped her. She has trusted me with her heart and her body and I have failed her by hurting her. I lost control of my hunger and she was hurt. I betrayed her trust and her love. What is left for us? Can I regain her trust? Should she be with a more kindred spirit like Deomo?

A human imperial and a rebel Zabrak…A deadly covert psy ops agent and a pure spiritual soul of a temple…Is this destined to be pure balance or pure chaos?

Personal Entry- Fate's Slap Across the Face

2005-03-20T10:39:00.000-06:00

I peaked around the corner, my DX2 pointing along the wall behind me, ready to cover my backside. Keren is not normally this quiet. Residents quickly turned and scurried away from me as the saw me. They knew why I was here…

My gaze focused on my target, my mind clearing from the random musings. Now is not the time for that. Now is the time for justice. My right arm shifted in front of me, placing the patrol captain in my sights. I fired. The charged bolt of acid sped towards my victim and found its mark. The captain staggered, looked around confused…I approached him with a slow, careful stride. I smirked at him as I raised my pistol to his head.

“Leave my town.”
*Feral*

The rest of the patrol came running at the sound of my firing. Around the corner they came running, skidding to a halt at the sight before them: their captain lying at my feet, staring at them with dead eyes, and half of his skull missing. I smirked at them…

“Who’s next?”
*Bloodlust*

They broke and ran. Unfortunately for the scared troopers, they ran right into Slice. I sat back and watched the carnage, taking careful aim at the exposed arm or leg. Who’s to say Slice is the only one that can toy with his prey?

*wicked grin*

As Sliced bathed himself, and I holstered my DX2, my thoughts returned to the recent turn of events…My…failures…My recent duties…Perhaps I have over extended myself. Perhaps I have been following the wrong calling and should relegate myself to the role of a simple soldier. My offensives on bases have proven my ability in head on combat. This, this trip to Keren…Is not even for duty. The Imperial recruiter called me late one evening saying the rebels had overrun the city. With Scarlet still with Narheen due to my negligence, I geared up and took a shuttle to Keren, the first city I arrived in when I first landed on Naboo. This was as close of a hometown as I will ever know. I will take it back…

The anger turned to shame as images of Scarlet on the floor of my sorosub filled my mind. She clutched her belly as waves of pain washed over me from the bond, where, so recently before, the feelings from her were hunger, pleasure, lust, love…There was blood on both of us. It was her blood…caused by my foolishness… my carelessness. I failed her, her daughter Meela, and Deomo…And everyone else that is dependent upon her. The Temple, Frysheka…I failed them as well…Gods, what ever made me think I could possibly take this on my shoulders? I have finally been forced to open my eyes to what I am: an over confident man that should relegate himself to the duties of a simple solider. I guess I should thank Fate for the hard lesson.
*chuckle*

Personal Entry- Weakness to the Feral

2005-03-16T09:57:00.000-06:00

Why is a covert agent reviewing the security of a temple converted into a base? Why am I tasked with such things on Yavin 4? I approached the temple as I felt Scarlet rise from a sleep on Dantooine. She reached out to across the bond *smile* I need to wrap this up so I can see her, it has been too long…Much, much to long. Speeding back to the starport I was struck with a feral scream across the bond…rage, fury, bloodlust…Gods what is she doing? I called to her and received a disoriented response. I urged her to stay in the medical center until I arrived. Speeding off in my tie to Dantooine, I ran into the medical center to see her calmly sitting on the bed. A few places of her armor were scorched, but not with a laser weapon…I looked at her exposed skin…a few hits it seems, but not burned…they felt cold…Ah!! Pirates and their SG82 rifles…She did not seem to be in too much pain, her injuries were minimal, especially for a Zabrak. I reached under her padded armor to lift her shirt slightly so I could inspect her stitches. Perfect…no damage.

I wanted to show her Theed while I could escort her. Stormtroopers can be made to turn the other way, however if she were to go alone…Scarlet needed to see the occupation so she could be prepared for it. When we landed I was greeted with laser fire from a Rebel Sniper. *sigh* I pulled out my DX2 and charged him. I knocked him down with my pistol and told him to stop. He would not stop struggling and fighting. I raised the pistol and took aim at his head.
I am sorry your duty has caused you to be foolish…

I ran back to the Starport to see Brem. Scarlet was excitedly talking to him. The errant rebel came by and tried to attack us. Brem and I quickly showed them why they should leave us be. Scarlet was not happy. There were too many people so we went to the cantina. Wow, again, too many people for Scarlet this quick after being cooped up. We stepped outside and then it hit me…

Her smell…but she was not there. Standing before me was Highway. *feral* I felt the hair on my neck bristle. Her scent is on this ranger…

*Max?*

I snapped out of something I had not felt for awhile. The feral bloodlust wanted to consume me. I looked down and noticed my trigger finger was stroking my sidearm. I fought for control, for focus. I could hear Highway and Scarlet speaking but do not know what they said.

*Maxell what is it? She must live her own life.*

*feral*

If he harms her…

*I know, I fear for his life should he ever harm her*

No, not his life…his friends, his family…his guild…Will all die!! I will leave him alive to suffer in the death that was caused by his carelessness. All their blood will be on his hands!!

*shiver*

They were talking again. Scarlet said let’s leave and we parted. Gods what came over me? A scary part of my mind opened up and let loose a flood of emotions across the bond, radiating outward for all to sense.

We went to the starport and boarded my sorosub. Silence, beautiful silence…no scents, no sounds besides our own. I began to shrug off my battle armor. Scarlet stood before me. We spoke of my actions, I apologized for my weakness. We went into the main room and spoke, standing face to face. Something touched me from the bond, a...hunger…*shock* It had been so long…Scarlet, the feelings, the bond, the love…my hunger…I stepped away intent on taking her upstairs to the observation deck. My sudden withdraw shook her from her state. She was embarrassed and shocked at herself. Scarlet, it has been so long for you, for us…

We went upstairs and looked at the beauty before us. She stared out into space at the shimmering stars and nebulas. I stared at the soft curves of her body and her face as the starlight danced across it. Sensing me close to her she turned and we embraced. Gods it has been so long…her touch on my flesh, her lips to mine…the hunger consumed us both…kisses, soft bites, the tight grip of passion surrounded us.

*PAIN!!*

The wave of pain washed over me from the bond. Gods what has happened to her?!?! I slowly withdrew my tight embrace from her…Kark…blood…I got up and began frantically putting on clothing. I told her to try to do the same that I was flying her back to Dantooine and Dr. Narheen. She was upset at our foolishness, as was I. It was stupid of me. I am stronger then that. I should have known. I should not have lost myself to my desires. I failed her…Dammit I failed her.

Personal Entry- Duty Calls, I Must Answer

2005-03-14T09:21:00.000-06:00

I should have left the comm. off but as of late, certain events have me concerned. Theed was overrun by rebels briefly, and as I was passing through earlier, Vader himself landed in front of the starport. He glided from his transport with an air of authority that caused several people I knew to be covert rebels run. The novatroppers dispatched were frightening to most as well. It is unknown who served as a template for those clones. I would be curious to know, perhaps I will look into it.

I answered my comm. to hear the voice of someone that should be my subordinate. Due to my official rank, I am relegated to taking this protie’s orders. I was dispatched to a base to take it out. A base assault, interesting change of pace. Certainly, it is a far cry from the covert ops I normally find myself in. Instead of quietly slicing someone’s throat in an alley, this will be a full assault. I went to a reliable medic and received injections to enhance my endurance. I dusted off my composite armor…*smiles* Blood red…reminds me of the Dance of Death…To see her dance again…soon Tai’Shan, very soon.

A rode my speeder to the coordinates and stopped some distance to call Sloth and a trained Blurg to me. I peered at the base from my prone position on the hillside…hmmm…highest ranking officer: Captain, a lot of privates looking a bit scared…perhaps this is not the first attempt at taking them out. No matter, rank is the first to go…I slowly crawled a bit closer, kneeled and took aim with my Republic Blaster. Dodged…Great, one of those days…Troops came pouring out of the base, all either limping or poorly armed. Damn, three more captains…this may not be as easy as I would have thought. I changed my position, putting a house in between myself and the snipers. That cut my attackers in half. It was me, Sloth, and my blurg against 3 captains, 2 snipers, and about 10 privates that looked scared. My pets took care of them as I focused on the captains. Bodies began piling up around us. Simple…A waste of my time, but simple…After taking them out I circled to the snipers and ended their tour of duties quickly. As I stood over the corpses Zultan approached, an Imperial Commando. We began the base destruction sequence only to discover we were not properly trained to finish the sequence. We needed a Bioengineer to bypass the DNA lock and a bounty hunter to hack the uplink. Kark!! I am not trained for this. Why is my time being wasted on grunt work?

For years I have tried to keep Avios away from the War. Now, perhaps it is time. If I can get him under my command, my concern will be minimal. I can task my pets to guard him and keep my own eye on him at all times. Gods, what will Ebe think? It has been so long since I have seen her. The empire would have recruited him sooner or later and possibly, discovered his past. This may be the only chance we have for protecting it, and what I did to save him. Ebe will have to understand. Perhaps she will fight by our side. I know she has been spending time with some ranger acquaintances…Loves? I do not know yet…I can’t deal with that now. She must be able to lead her own life. We made our choice…It is just that…damn…Perhaps some base destruction missions are what I need to clear this from my head.

Personal Entry- On the Mend

2005-03-09T07:36:00.000-06:00

Finally…she woke and we were able to talk at length. It was wondrous. For too long have I had to hold the hand of a wounded soul. For too long have I had to hope and pray that Death would overlook this one creature that I hold so dear to me. This evening was the first indication that Scarlet is finally recovering from her long ordeal. The relief washed over me look the first rush of fresh air when you land at a starport and remove your flight helmet. She asked what all she had missed…so much has changed, some good, some…Much, much worse. The war has escalated. Luckily, before she was bed-ridden, she put in paperwork to be put on leave. Thankfully this should afford her the opportunity to travel unfettered.

I bathed her gently, relishing the softness of her flesh once again. Focusing on the task at hand, I tempered the feelings rushing into my mind, our nights on the sorosub…
*smile*
The doctor checked her stitches and said they were clean and were healing nicely. Thankfully, some good news. Her vitals fluctuated as she exerted strength and tried to move. She is still too unstable to get up. She will have to be patient.

Deomo has left to face his Fate with the pendant. Scarlet witnessed a hint of what he has asked me to do should he fail. I did not tell her as she does not need the worry at this time. A Zabrak scout who is an old friend of mine, came to the lab. He took both fingerprint and DNA samples from the incubation tube where Deomo was. It saddened my heart as he wistfully touched the glass. I was pained to see both a troubled father and a man backed into a corner by Fate. My promise to him shot to the forefront of my mind as he touched the glass…An opportunity that cannot be passed up. Should he not come looking for us, we can now go to him.

Personal Entry- Deomo Facing Fate

2005-03-08T14:05:00.000-06:00

Sometimes my senses startle me. Gifted or cursed…I have been granted the ability of a heightened perception of most people. Sometimes this manifests in a mental awareness of their thoughts, sometimes it manifests as a sense, a smell…Much like an animal.

Interestingly animals are very in tune with another sentient’s feelings. My cats have often nuzzled me when I have been tired, felt disconnected, or just lost to the world. When Mystyn died, most of my time was spent leaning on Slice and just staring into the stars. She patiently laid there, curled around my shoulders. At times, it appears she acknowledges me with a slight nod of her head…Other times, she has cocked her head to the side as if she was studying my face.

Last night I sensed…smelled something on Deomo. Not only the sense of sickness, which I attribute to the pendant, but there was also something new there. It was not quite fear…close…but that was not it. It was more a feeling of pained acceptance. He knows what he must face, I certainly do…Scarlet...May not be aware of it yet. She does not need something else to worry about. Scarlet is still far from stable. I want her healed and up. Deomo may need her, and I certainly need her. I miss the dance of death, and I am certain she does as well.

*grin*

Deomo and I spoke of Meela as well. Normally, Dr. Narheen would want to manipulate an embryonic Zabrak in her care to avoid the difficulties associated with their species. She has studied a way to permanently correct this sometimes fatal flaw in the Zabrak species. Deomo is adamantly opposed to it. He feels he can either raise her and teach her control, or…I do not know…At times it took both Deomo and I to keep Scarlet in check when she was lost to the feral calling. In Meela, this calling is much stronger. If he should fail in his battle with the pendant…Will Scarlet and I be able to raise her? Will Scarlet’s teachings of the Temple afford her the tools for the level of self control she will need? Unfortunately, I have read of the Zabrak culture and I know what happens to children lost to the feral nature. This I will not do. Undoubtedly, the Empire has its eyes on Meela as well. They will not take her as they took Avios. No matter what it takes…

Personal Entry- Gratitude Fleeting

2005-03-07T15:29:00.000-06:00

I wish I could say it is over, but it is not. Meela is safe, but Scarlet is hanging on by a thread. I cling to that thread with all of my being; trying to pull her back. Deomo will soon battle the pendant.

Deomo…kark him and his pendant…We had to wait 10 minutes for him to put away his weapon for safety reasons, and he dares tell me not to threaten? The hate and fear of the situation and the potential loss of his daughter prompted him to threaten any of us that moved. Once Meela was safe, he dares tell me not to threaten Dr. Narheen when she was clearly neglecting Scarlet? Kark him and his priorities. I understand him being relieved at Meela’s stability. My relief would have been noticed if I was not so concerned for Scarlet. He should have the decency and compassion to understand, as much as I have for him.

Every instinct yells at me to take him out of the equation. They always have. Were it not for Scarlet’s feelings for him initially, my realization of his humanity later, and now his love for his unborn daughter…I don’t know. Even I can see the humanity there. It wants to come out. Cauil could barely contain him when he was at his worst. I only hope he can learn to contain himself. If not, my hand will be forced to do so.

*feral*

Journal Entry- Meeting with Fate

2005-03-06T10:00:00.000-06:00

Witnessing pain in the eyes of my enemies is something I have, at times, relished. Their suffering is usually earned by their dark actions. As I told the residents of Eden’s Grief as I left, “You reap what you sow.” We are often the cause of our own trials, our actions creating consequences we must face.

With Deomo, this is no longer the case. His actions in fulfilling his duty have no bearing on the pain he is suffering at the hands of the pendant. In his eyes I see the look of a pained man…One that knows there is a fight on the horizon…One that knows the consequences of failure.

He asked me to meet him in the Theed cantina. Once he removed his helmet, his eyes, combined with his pale complexion, indicated a lack of time. Scarlet must undergo the procedure tonight. Meela must be stable, and out of danger for Deomo’s struggle with the pendant. Scarlet must be strong enough to help Meela defend against the pendant itself. However, in actuality, this is not a major concern. I have felt Meela strike out against the pendant. The pendant was…Scared, shocked…she struck out with a pure feral force rooted with the force. Perhaps…perhaps she is Deomo’s only hope.

What of what Dr. Narheen told me? The level of the feral in Meela is dangerously high. In order to ensure survival, she would need Avios to help her manipulate the DNA slightly. If this is done, will Meela be able to defend her father against the pendant? If it is not done will there be any control over Meela?

Kark this conflict…this is not my choice. Deomo must know, Deomo and Scarlet must decide.

Journal Entry- All my Strength, All my Love

2005-02-22T11:50:00.000-06:00

I do not remember pain like this since Scarlet’s trial in the sands of Lok. What I feel now, makes me yearn for the heat, the barrenness…but not what I had to do. That is something I wish never to visit again. This time instead of blindness like before, my senses seem numbed. Perhaps they shut down or were turned down…Some sort of self-defense mechanism. Thankfully, even with my eyes closed, I can still sense Scarlet next to me. She seems to be getting stronger. The pain and fear is still there, but she is getting stronger…Last night she was strong enough to sit up. She wanted to turn and look at the unit in which Meela would grow and live. Avios came in, alerted to the sudden change in Scarlet’s heartbeat at her exertion sitting up. I smiled at him. He has had to endure a lot for us, for me; too much in fact. A son should not have to keep watch over his father and a woman he loves that is not his mother. It must be difficult, but there seems to be no animosity there. He is a good son, better than I deserve. I raised my hand to quiet him, to indicate Scarlet was too fatigued for his technical explainations. He understood with no words, smiling and nodding to me as he returned to the instruments.

Avios keeps fretting over my EKG reading. He says it is returning to what he would consider close to normal. Apparently my run in with the pendant did more damage internally than imagined…It was a darkness never seen before. It was impossible to defend against such a powerful force…I am lucky all I am left with is a numbness of my senses. For some reason, it seems it could have very easily been worse. I need to speak to Frysheka, perhaps she can offer some advice. Blocking what I know has always been easy...even the Inquisitor. He does not even notice me snooping…

When Scarlet becomes restless I try to soothe her. It is becoming more and more difficult to mask my fear and concern from her. I try to radiate the warmth of my love to her as I look into her eyes, and tenderly rub her belly…I whisper my love to her as she sleeps, hoping she hears me while visiting a more peaceful place…a prayer to the unknown, wishing her strength of will and strength of body:

Scarlet, my TaiShan, my love, my strength…
Sleep a peaceful sleep
Dream a restful dream
May your dreams dance of images so peaceful, and full of love
Think of us standing upon a hill, looking down on your temple
Smell the pure clean smell of the impending rain storm
See our child play along with Meela, and her father, Deomo
Hear us chuckle as they tackle him to the ground, tickling him, making the proud Zabrak Warrior laugh aloud
Touch my hand as we smile at each other, our eyes full of love

Journal Entry- Dream or Reality?

2005-02-18T13:30:00.000-06:00

I awoke suddenly, startled from a dream. Reaching for my FWG5, a hand pushed me back down…why am I so weak?

“Shh…you won’t find your pistol, I took it, and you need to rest.”

I looked up and began to rage against the person holding me down.

“Father, stop…”

“Avios…Avios what the kark? Where am I what happened? Give me my pistol, NOW!!!”

“Dad, rest, I do not know what all you have been through, your EKG reading is chaotic, you need to relax. Scarlet, she is not well. I will need your help. We all need you to be strong.”

Scarlet!!! TaiShan!!! *feral*

*calm*

“Give me my pistol.”

“You mean this pistol?” Avios swing his arm behind him, then quickly brought has hand in front of him, spinning the pistol so that the handle was facing me.

*smile, pride* “Show off.”

“Relax Dad. I am going to go rest now. Dr. Narheen will take the next shift to monitor Scarlet.”

“Son, thank you, and…never take my gun from me again.” *smile*

As I became more aware of my surroundings, the headache grew. A dull throbbing emanated from my skull. The memories slowly began to creep back…

A saw a dull black, cloudy image; both menacing and frightful to Scarlet. An essence of Deomo was there as well. A warmth in my hand…Meela…Why? Why am I holding her in front of Deomo? I do not want this. Then the darkness shifted and turned them…Having handed Meela to Scarlet I approached and was knocked down. My mind shuddered. I could not focus. Then Meela struck at the darkness. Gods the child!!! Scarlet!!! The darkness cringed back…That is it, she is the key…I stumbled to my feet and approached the darkness again. It pounced on me as I was clearly the weakest antagonist at that point. It struck another blow. As I was shoved away from all of them, I remember begging Meela to strike again as its focus was on me. She did. Pure feral rage lashed out with a sword of the Force at the darkness. I remember smiling as the once fearsome thing faltered before a mere child. Then….nothing…blackness.

I remember leter being startled by a weak cry from Scarlet. Gods she was hurt, in pain, distressed, non-responsive.
*feral*
I focused on the feral instinct urging me to protect my mate. Perhaps not the mother of my child, but at least, for now, my soul-mate. The rage radiated from my body, but it was focused into sheer resolve. I forced myself to stand…Scarlet was before me, passed out, laying in a pool of blood…Gods what had happened?? Without hesitating, I wrapped her in my cloak and scooped her into my arms. I ran from the Temple and to the Lab…Arriving at the door I hesitated a moment…Did I just run 200m carrying Scarlet? The thought was fleeting. I quickly entered and yelled, “At ease!!” as the guard approached me. I ran down stairs to Dr. Narheen and laid Scarlet on the bed…

Beyond that is a blur of blood, fear, and panic. I did what was asked of me by both my son and Narheen…I am only a novice medic, I hope…I hope I did not fail her…

Then…Everything was fine…Scarlet weakly reached to me across the bond, the doctor and Avios cleaned up as I sat…I could not move. My body was numb…

How long have I been sleep…ing? How looon…… *sleep*

Journal Entry-Failed Duty, End Game

2005-02-17T13:49:00.000-06:00

I think I have failed her. In my absence she was almost lost, as was Meela. The poor child…When the pendant called, she went running towards it thinking it was her father. With the feral so strong in this one, I would have thought her instincts would have been more perceptive. Even on the most basic of levels, that deep animalistic undercurrent that we all have allows us, one would think, to recognize our true parents at any age. I hope I helped somewhat. As much as I hate to I had to reach for her. She must recognize me if I am to protect them from the pendant should Deomo fail with his battle.

The uneasiness radiating from Scarlet is shredding my insides. I have done all I can, it does not seem to be enough. I wanted her to visit the lab in its current state. While painful, I do not want the first time she sees the lab to be when she is about to go under the knife…Hopefully this will make her a bit more calm with what will happen. I know it was unpleasant for her. I watched as she slowly approached the incubation tube and lightly touched the glass…She did not see it, but a tear escaped my eye. The pain was apparent; I turned to her, offering my open arms to her. No words were needed; she just needed someone to hold her up. I gladly did.

I knew when she looked up at me, that she needed to get out. I was already turning when she said it. Seeing the stairs, I turned back around. Instead of offering her a hand or a shoulder to lean on, I scooped her up to carry her up the stairs. My first thought was to take her to Hendola, no she cannot travel now, not in this state. We returned to the temple. She was drained.

I tried reaching for Meela. I am consumed with concern for the both of them and that karking pendant. I tried to show Meela how to hide, how to go to her mother if she was afraid…She did not recognize fear yet. Scarlet would not let me…I...Do not think I could have if she had allowed it. In fear she threw up a wall against me. Gods, it was so weak, she is so weak right now…

I closed my eyes and focused on our bond. With my mind I weaved a wall around her, protecting her and Meela. I pointed her to the door, showed her the key. She was scared, felt trapped. It was all instinctive; I had never approached doing anything like that before, with anyone. Scarlet felt trapped, I reminded her a wall was not a wall when it had a door wide open. I reminded her that she held the key, as did I. We can control who is allowed in. She will control…I would not dare to do more than I already have.

I worry that she feels I am being too intrusive, that I am pushing too much…At times, people need that, even her…Even Deomo. Scarlet is pushing him to learn to fight the pendant. I have had to push Scarlet so that she would have to face reality. Gods I wish it wasn’t so…Duty… *anger*

If it means her life, I will push all I can. If I loose her, push her away from me, if it means her life…

*despair*

I will not hesitate.

Journal Entry- Duty

2005-02-16T13:54:00.000-06:00

Duty…One person’s duty used to be the bane of my existence. His blind devotion to an ideal that was not fully comprehended…He believed what he was told because he had too. A second thought was never given, an order was an order…The pain and destruction created was no cause for a pause. Quite possibly, they haunted him at night, but who among us does not have those demons?

I find myself faced with duty again…Stuck half way across the galaxy, unable to return…A slave to the whim of the admiral of this vessel. A more important Duty awaits me on Dantooine. The daughter of the man who once tormented me, and chalked it doing his duty, is dependent upon my success. My love, my Tai’Shan’s life, also is balanced along the blade of Fate. A slip either way, and all will be lost. I can sense her pain and distress across our bond. It has me restless. Already, I have sent four troopers to the infirmary, spent 3 nights in the brig, and…well…I don’t think I’ll mention the other…what the Admiral doesn’t know, won’t hurt him…

Everything is in place once I am able to return. I will have to try and remember my engineering skills so I may follow the schematics I…Acquired, to make the lab. I will have to relocate the doctor as well.

Deomo should be made aware of my plans as well. Hopefully Scarlet has spoken to him. Hopefully she has the strength to help him prepare for his battle with the pendant…Soon I will return, I promise Tai’shan, and you will have all my strength to help you.

Journal Entry- Fate Sets its eye on Ebe

2005-02-09T10:56:00.000-06:00

I watched her run around Theed, creating distance form her opponent…Just enough to turn and fire her T21, only to begin running again. The poor wookie did not know what he was standing up against. I had just knocked him out for having asked Ebe if she was given beads, would she flash him. He never saw envy hiding in the shadows of the building. They never do. *smirk* You would think he would have remembered after I had killed the smuggler that recognized me, and tried to sell me spice. Karking reputation…

I wonder what Fate has in store for Ebe? Our lives have, and will always be intertwined. Throughout all of our trials in life, our feelings for each other have always been there. Love? Yes, it is, I cannot fool myself. Perhaps I understand Scarlet’s pain with loving two at once now. Although in this case, my heart belongs to Scarlet, and Ebe knows this.

I often thought of, how would I live should I have to let Scarlet go to Deomo…I had concluded that some of Scarlet’s heart would be better than none. Perhaps she is feeling the same way. I wish there was something I could do. My heart aches seeing her consumed by so much conflict.

Perhaps I should ask Ebe if she would help look for Tempestia, or possibly, help Elca with Kayon. I was recently contacted by a friend of Tempestia’s. He said she had given him her comm. and that he should contact me should anything happen. Interesting…I know we had shared many loud unruly nights in the Theed cantina together…however never…hmm, did either of us go home with the other. She did keep me out of trouble when the feral was strong with me and I was fighting the Taishan bond with Scarlet, not yet recognizing it for what it was…I am concerned. I have still not heard anything. Maybe Ebe could contact Elca, find some slaver contacts. I know Tempestia was once a slave as well. Perhaps…Gods, perhaps she was captured in one of the spacing lanes.

However…After my most recent talk with Ebe, perhaps she should speak with Elca, *smiles* and her friends.

Journal Entry- Doctor's and their Oath

2005-02-09T10:06:00.000-06:00

I spoke with Dr. Narheen a length. Perhaps we have come to an agreement. As much as I hate to be dependant on her, we both know that I am. If she proves to be trustworthy, she may yet live. The doctor does have some benevolent ideas to help the Zabrak race. Perhaps through genetic engineering, the problems Scarlet is having because of her birth on her home planet, and its radiation, may be eliminated. While that is all well and good, it is not a concern of mine now. I want Scarlet safe. I want Meela safe. If that requires putting Meela into stasis and growing her rapidly in an incubator, then so be it. Deomo must be made to understand. Undoubtedly this will be difficult. He does not trust me, and I am sure does not trust this stranger of a doctor. Scarlet will have to tell him. I will only enrage him as I always seem to do.

The plans will be in my hands by nightfall for the lab. Hopefully, my…contacts will have located the other equipment the doctor requested. Scarlet fell asleep on my ship, exhausted from the short jaunt to the spaceport. After speaking with Dr. Narheen at some length, I escorted her back to my quarters and secured the hatch. I went to check on Scarlet. She laid there sleeping a peaceful sleep. No, I am not selfish enough to wake her. *smiled* I sat on the bed next to her’s and watched. I wonder if this is what she does to me when I sleep. I watched her chest heave with each slow, even breath. It is clear why she likes doing this to me. Sitting here sharing this peaceful moment with her…It has been too long for us. I miss this time. Reluctantly I returned to my bridge and set a course for Dantooine to take her back to the temple to sleep. I placed her lightly at the foot of the bed as she hates to be in a bed or on any furniture. I touched her shoulder lightly as I left…I thought of reaching for Meela, to hug her goodnight…but no, it is not my place to do so. She has a father…and I am not it. *slight despair*

Journal Entry- Loose Ends

2005-02-07T13:44:00.000-06:00

**Remember: this is written in Maxell's personal journal on his person.**
I know he needs her strength right now, what little she has to offer. He has his own demons to fight, and none of us will truly be safe until he has either won his battle, or succumbed to the pendant. Once he is lost, my manacles will be removed and he will be dealt with appropriately. I will not have That Evil take Scarlet or his child either. If he is lost I think he would want it this way. As long as he is able to be the good father that he must for that child, then he will be welcomed around her mother. I think now, he is

If only he would now learn to think for himself and not trust blindly in that damned emblem on his sleeve. He does not realize how close he was too loosing them both. No more, Deomo, Scarlet, their child are all safe. I do not care if he knows what I did or not. His anger and blind rage did not even allow him to trust me. It was almost ruined. Luckily he made no mention of the scent of blood as he passed. The poor woman, she did not know what she had done would sign a death sentence for herself

*flash!!!*
"You!! Will never touch my TaiShan again!!!"
I feel her bones snap in my hand as I wrench her head to the side. For good measure I ensure she doesn't scream and has a big, wide smile with my knife as she dies...My eyes widen as the scent of the blood hits my nostrils *feral* Luckily most of it is in the airlock, easy cleanup, most will be wiped clean from the vacuum of space.

*rage*
*flash!!!*
*laughs* and the nurse...Poor wretch. Use my Taishan for your career? Use your children for experimentation? Ha!!! Death would be too easy, I think I will play with this one, take what is most valuable, her career...She will be discredited and ostracize from her field. Then, perhaps, I will send some friends after her...To toy with her as she dies.

*flash!!!*
*calm*
The other one, well we still have more to talk about. I have enough to begin construction. A suitable place needs to be located so I can start; an architect will also need to be found. Gods, I need to tell Scar'let, and Deomo. Not until his fight with the pendant is over with. He will need access to the energy of his child to anchor him to reality if he is to have a chance to fight the pendant. Once Scar'let and the child are;I just do not know what he will feel. What any of us will feel. One thing is for sure. Avios has confirmed Dr. Narheen's assessment: Scar'let will not be able to carry the child to term. Both she and the child may perish as a result of the Zabrak physiology as it relates to child-birth. I cannot allow that. Making Deomo understand will be no small task. My only choice is to tell Scar'let and have her tell Deomo when the time comes. Once he has battled the pendant, not before.

She must also speak to him about that fight. I tried to tell her last night, but could not bring myself to doing it. If she is attacked by the pendant I will do all in my power to protect her. Can I severe his bond with Scarlet? If it means saving her, or the child I will not hesitate. I hope Deomo is made to understand my motivations are not out of malice towards him. Without her I feel I would descend into a darker place than he has been. She gives me direction where there is none. She makes me want to be a better man. She is everything.

Origin of Avios-Part I

2005-02-04T16:01:00.000-06:00

“What? That was you, that couldn’t have been you. Why did you not tell me until now?” My mind tried to remember our time together.
“Remember? In boot…Long black hair? Took all the boys’ credits betting at the rifle range? Took out the Darkwings on my own…”

Oh Gods her!!! It all came flooding back into my mind. A scrappy refugee from a ship had joined our battalion in boot camp. The others tried to pick on her, and worse. There were not many females around. It is not often that someone stood up to the Darkwings.

The Darkwings were a group of punk human and Zabrak recruits. They asked for me to join, but I have never been a follower in a group. I had my own circle of friends. For some reason, they looked up to me. I never understood why. The first Darkwing to show up hurt was Samson. Samson was easily the largest of the Darkwings. He acted like their enforcer. No one had any information for the medics. We all looked on as the medics loaded him into a transport. He struggled to breathe and launched into a horrible primal scream after he turned his head and witnessed the medic holding his severed leg. None of us had seen wounds that severe. We were too new to training. We had not seen battle yet. Josh leaned to me and asked what I thought. I scanned the crowd of onlookers, looking for a clue as to what might have happened when she caught my eye. Her hair was out of compliance, interesting, how unlike this new protie. Strands were draped down over one eye. I saw a slight trickle of blood peak out from under the black of her hair. As if feeling my eyes, her head snapped to me. I kept eye contact with her. Even though she masked it on her face, I could…feel the hatred radiate off of her…Interesting…What an odd…perception to have of a person, their feelings…I motioned with my head for her to step aside out of the crowd. Josh noticed and looked at me knowingly. She frowned then defiantly turned in the direction I indicated. Josh fell in behind her then turned around, awaiting anyone that may be following. Once we were certain she had left unnoticed, I followed.

“Why did you attack him?”
She looked up at me as her eyes transitioned from hatred to fear at having been discovered.

“How? How did you know? He didn’t even know. I was so far away. It was a simple, clean shot…”

“I didn’t know. I had assumed and then you just told me.” I smiled at her, knowing she had walked into my trap. Panic spread across her face. I shook my head negatively and knelt before her, intending to look at her eye. “Someone needed to take the Darkwings down a notch. You just got to it before I could.” She looked up at me and offered a weak smile. I looked to Josh and he handed me the medpack. I tended to her bruised eye as best I could. Back then I was much more adept at healing. “Where did you get the rifle from?”

“Well, the other night I met Sgt. Sheldon at the cantina. He apparently could not stand to see a female recruit out drink him. He…left his id card at the table so I used it to gain access to the armory. The laser rifle has already been cleaned, and replaced. They will never know.”

I chuckled at the fine detail by which Ebe had carried out her plan. This is a smart one. Impressive…

“So what now Ebe?”

“That depends on the Darkwings. If they leave me alone, it is over. If Grant tries to touch me again, I will take out another one of his boys.”

I was taken aback a bit by her certainty and confidence in her statement.
“Very well, but do not underestimate the Darkwings. They have friends in high places.”

“Why the concern? Why do you even care about me?”

“I…cannot say. We have been tasked with watching you. The way you are treated by some of the others…Is intolerable. Certain, officers see promise in you. They want to be sure, you are given a fair shot.”

She stood, seeming offended.
“Sorry, but I do not need your help. I have always been able to take care of myself. Waste your time with another one of the skirts, do not concern yourself with me.” She stormed out.

“Wow, what a temper, you think she would be more grateful…Just another angry skirt. Grant will enjoy breaking that one.”

*rage*
I spun to Josh and gripped his throat in my hand, pushing him against the wall. “Never again will you speak of her in such a way. Don’t make me take you to my next class to…play with.” A wicked grin spread across my face as his eyes widen in fear of the implications my words carried. I released him and walked away. “I’m sorry.” He stood motionless rubbing his throat. “Go get some rest. The squad is going out in 0600 for maneuvers.”

Mission Report: Prisoner Transport

2005-02-04T11:21:00.000-06:00

Mission:
Transport of Prisoner aboard Medical Frigate: Morning Star

Mission Objective:
Ensure Lt. Col. Deomo Iafik is provided adequate transportation for the relocation of a prisoner. Destination classified.

Mission Status:
Complete

Casualties:
Dr. Hafa
Dr. Narheen

Mission Summary:
Lt. Col. Deomo Iafik, and his prisoner Scar’let Firecat were delivered to the Imperial Outpost on Dantooine. While traveling through Dantooine Space, we were attacked by Rebels. Dr. Hafa was killed when a hull section collapsed under fire. Airlock doors were automatically closed, sealing the damaged area before other casualties occurred. Unfortunately the doctor was set adrift into space and perished. Because of the battle, body recovery was impossible. As the battle continued, Dr. Narheen was unfortunately crushed by falling debris. Death was instantaneous. The sight was gruesome and it was decided, due to the suspect’s fragile medical condition, that the vision of the doctor would be too traumatic. I ordered my co pilot to prepare the body for a quick space burial, and to clean the area. I am turning in all personal belongings of the doctor’s along with this report. Her medical supplies, a datapad journal, and what looks to be professional credentials were damaged and rendered useless. I had my crewman dispose of the worthless items in the ship’s incinerator.

I took the liberty of having the Morning Star repaired at the Dantooine Space station.

Dream- Visions of Fate

2005-02-03T16:06:00.000-06:00

I stood atop a hill, armored and heaving with effort under the weight of my responsibilities. Yet I endured.

In one hand I held a sword. Finely crafted, it dripped with rage and malcontent for those that stood against it. In the other hand, a book: binding of smooth, rich leather holding gilded pages together. The beauty of the knowledge it contained is awe inspiring. It could bring those that read it tears of joy, or tears of the worst anguish imagined.

I look at both hands and marvel at the power radiating from there; each equally strong, yet containing weaponry that could not be more different. There is no rage from within. A calm coolness soothes my soul. I realize I am but a carrier of these tools. I keep them standing up, ready to dance with their foe.

*shiver*

*feral*

Woe be the fate of one that should harm these tools. While not mine to own, they are mine to protect. Anyone who should wish them ill will have their soul pulled down into the darkest pits of despair.

I see a face.

*rage*

*STARTLE!!!!*

I bolt from bed, drawing my FWG5 out from under my pillow, and take aim at the only moving object. Hmmpphh…No need to shoot Envy’s twitching tail in his sleep…I reholster the gun and sit on the end of my bed, my head in my hands, sweat soaking my forehead.

*It is time to end it…No more*

Personal Entry- Surprises

2005-02-02T09:23:00.000-06:00

Finally, home…

I checked my comm. Messages and saw that a friend had collected my order together. I ran off to Corellia and picked it up. Outstanding!! Scar’let will be so surprised. Next stop was to swing by home. I met the mayor of Hendola and had him do a favor for me, for a friend; well obviously more than a friend but he is on a need to know basis, and frankly, he didn’t need to know the details. Better let it stay private that a rebel trooper is in love with an Imperial Officer, best for the both of us that way, for now at least.

*Taishan*

We chatted a bit then his comm. went off. Ah, the life of a mayor; one aspect of my past that I do not miss. I was sure to give him a little something extra for his efforts and for the city, something never done to me. *chuckle*

I made my way to Dantooine and the temple. During my flight, Ebe commed me, wondering if I was available to be her wingman. Stupid question, of course…We had some troubles with her mission. It took several tries, and we even called another friend. It did not go well. We were outnumbered over and over again. Luckily, Ebe’s Eject button is in good working order. As much use as she got out of it last night, she may want to have the mechanics take a peak at it to be sure it isn’t worn out. *smile* As I was cleaning up the last little bits of rebels, and ensuring the remaining squad hyper-spaced out in one piece, I received a comm. from the Imperial Navy.

Prisoner transport? What the kark? Some high and mighty Lt. Col. is escorting a prisoner to…well I better not say…what a waste of my time. To think, I haven’t even had the chance to see Scar’let yet or review the Temple's communication logs.

*Frustration*

Personal Entry- Thoughts Among the Stars

2005-02-01T13:09:00.000-06:00

I have always relished the long assignments. Even when loved ones must be left behind, the travel time and disconnect from my life offers me a sort of peace; a time to sort things out. So much has occurred to me recently. I have lost loved ones and found new ones where I would have least expected them. I find myself having to share her heart with another, and I have accepted it as a way of life for me. Before, any threat to what I wanted would have been killed…granted the last one was a slaver, but that makes no difference. To this day I question my intentions: Was I freeing a slave or capturing a new lover for my own? That guilt will be with me until my days here are over. Perhaps that is why I have been able to have….hmmm…enough….restraint with this current situation. What I feel, only holding half her heart, is more than enough reason not to let go. My only concern is the child. Would the child be better off without me? Who could do a better job of protecting Scarlet and the child? Will he be the father that he should be? Will he allow Scarlet to choose her own path and not bully her into his? If she chooses a life without me for the child so be it. As painful as it is, if it is her choice, I will accept it. However, I will not run away from her, him, or the child. It is all her choice.

Voices from the grave call to me to answer a responsibility I promised myself I would never shoulder again, yet I stand with open arms. I find my mind planning, rumbling with thoughts about how to manage the temple and help Scarlet. I am not one for the spiritual stuff. My near catastrophic failure with Deomo taught me that. Standing behind her is still with her. My only wish is that I could be more of a help. Perhaps I can. I know of things that need to be done. Perhaps I will take them on.

I look forward to getting off of this shuttle and getting my feet back on the ground. Not having Scarlet in my life makes me feel as if I am missing a lung. I feel emptiness inside, but know that she is alright. She has Deomo to watch out for her. Soon I will be back with her. I hope that she is well enough to go hunting now. She cannot forget what she has learned of her sword work.

*TaiShan, I will be with you soon, my heart and my love yearn for your sight. Soon I can feel your soft eyes gaze upon me as your hand runs through my hair.*

Personal Entry- Flight to Heal a Heart

2005-01-25T14:36:00.000-06:00

Kor Vella? What am I doing here? My speeder was flaming, the engine almost overheated. I landed in Coronet, but why am I here? Then it came back to me.

Scarlet, the child, Deomo, all of it…I must have rode here in a haze. *pain*

I sensed Scarlet had left my house, kark!! She is supposed to be taking it easy. Am I going to have to tie her down when I leave? Why does she risk her child? I felt her wonderment at a giant peko peko. Gods, please do not let her try to pick a feather, they really do not like it when you do that, and in her shape, I doubt she could fend off an attack. I implored her to return to the safety of a town. To Keren, amongst the NSF guards. There is very little crime in my old city, never has been.

She was at the starport idle. Then, suddenly she left, taking it easy huh? Do not worry about me huh? I found her at a gazebo out in the water. Quite a beautiful place, this must have been what she wanted to show me. It was…hard to look her in the eye, the tears would not leave. I hid behind my helmet, my shroud of shame…

I wish now, looking back, she could see the pain on my face as I raged at her. Anger consumed me, not directed at her, but rather, at Fate. Damn her (Fate) for doing this to me…Again!!! I turned from her and felt her approach from behind. She reached for me, the pain pulled me away from her touch, but the ache in my heart for her beckoned me to take her hand. The warmth of her hand and her love spread through out my body, encased my heart, and shattered the shell that was trying to form. The tears flowed. I knew the mistake had been made. My pain hurt her, but no more. No matter what room she has for me in her life, I will gladly fill it. She asked for me to remove my helmet. The tears flowed as she reached for me; I fell into her arms and cried on her shoulder. To think of the strength I have shown in the face of adversity, and to see the weakness I have now…Her life being a part of mine is truly important.

We decided to leave and headed for the starport. We flew to Theed to board her sorosub into space. We launched, then once out of the atmosphere she stood:

“Fly us somewhere pretty.”

Her, in this ship with me, was all the beauty I could ever need. I remembered a fire-red nebula in an outlying sector around Corellia. Once the coordinates were entered the hyperdrive kicked in and we were off.

“Wow.” “WOW!!!”
*chuckle*

She moved form window to window peering out at the colors. I was remembered of the first few times she flew with me. I had to have Envy sit with her in a hallway in the middle of the ship. She became so ill at the slightest movement. Now, she moved around like a little kid at a candy store. Maybe someday, she would be willing to fly in my gunner’s seat against some pirates. I could at least give her an outstanding show.

Once she was satisfied with the view, had taken her pictures, we moved to sit and talk a bit. A wave of pain hit her; I reached with my mind for her child, trying to soothe it. The child reached for me back, recognizing me. This is a concern. Deomo’s child must not imprint herself onto me. I am not the father and will not allow him to be replaced. No matter how I may wish to be. It will not happen. My soul nor my honor would allow that.

She curled in my lap and began that soft rumble; like a cat’s purr. I felt something from my inner being. A feeling of pure bliss and love wanted to escape. I never wanted to leave this place, this time. I tried to purr as she had.

*purr….cough!! cough!!....purr*

I will have to practice, and dream that we may have many more nights like this one that will give me reason to want to show her what I learn.

Personal Entry- Pain of Heart and Head

2005-01-24T23:39:00.000-06:00

This headache is going to make this entry difficult. I do not remember much from yesterday, after my last entry. *pain* I do remember her words…

“Maxell, the child is not yours, it’s Deomo’s”

I remember the shockwave of pain that followed. The primal scream that rose from deep within my soul. I knew the truth, in my heart all along. To hear the words from her lips…Gods it was like my body was thrown into the air and left to drop to its death. This empty, sinking feeling swept through me. I turned, unable to see her, the pain was too much. She reached for my hand, I pulled away. Her touch would surely sear my skin and burn me with pain through to my heart. Gods what now???

She pleaded with me and I finally relented. I felt the tremor of her pain through our bond. My resolve returned, my heart could wait. She needed to be in a medical center, now. Deomo had to know, now. We traveled into Theed and the medical center, this much I remember. Deomo stepped in, my heart sank at the sight, knowing the truth. I had to leave. The sight of them together, the family, was too much to bare. I parted with simple words to Deomo, “reach for the child, soothe her, it helps Scarlet and the child.”

I ran to the shelter of the cantina, determined to hide in a drunken stupor…no smugglers around, hmm, no spice…Good, I did not want any anyway. Luckily I did not have to be tempted. Deomo called me back, I popped a breath cleanser so Scarlet would not smell the weakness on my breath. He beckoned me to the next room. Imploring that Scarlet take it easy the next few days she is with me. How nice of him to grant me this time with our TaiShan, MY TAISHAN!!! I nodded, not wanting to tip the scales of our fragile relationship. The thoughts that went through my head though…Gods…I would be ripping Scarlet’s heart out if I were to do half the things I wanted…

I ran back into the cantina, and….nothing, I do not remember. All I have to show for whatever happened was this hangover, my clothes strewn about my room, and Scarlet by my side.

Duty…I will loose myself to the things I must do. I will go run my errands on Corellia while she sleeps. The temple must be secured, I must purchase weapons to outfit my new tie bomber, and purchase additional medical supplies from Rouge.

Duty…is that all I have now?

Personal Entry- Time Alone.or not?

2005-01-24T21:05:00.000-06:00

I spent most of the morning taking care of some loose ends before we left to get away from it all. Scarlet, my TaiShan, and I…well and her unborn child. *hope* Fate seems to have told me who’s it is, as if it is already determined, yet, I still cling to hope. Perhaps Fate will smile on me once. Just once, please…

Reaching for her via our bond, I sensed Scarlet had traveled into town to Theed, specifically in the cantina. She was focused, not even seeing me come in, very unlike her: a Zabrak, especially one trained as a tracker. I sat back and watched her as I siphoned through my comm. messages. Her head rose with a sudden awareness of my presence, she looked at me and smiled. All I could do is smile back. She seemed pained, something was wrong. Perhaps getting away from here, to a going-away party for a novice creature handler that I trained once.

I remember the cute dancer fascinated by my pet as I lumbered into the cantina in Theed after a long fight. She riddled me with questions and asked to see my pets. I beckoned for her to follow me outside and I showed her all of them, each and everyone. She cringed at the arachnids, and jumped with glee at the kitties. I walked her through the basics of pet management. She was so excited…I shall miss Amberlia’s exuberance and youthful innocence.

Scarlet agreed and traveled with me to the small city nestled on a shore. Quite beautiful, I had never been here before. We all talked and the friendly locals came up to Scarlet and introduced themselves. On one level it was funny, seeing the Queen of the Dance of Death with the Blade hover in the background and cringe when a new face approached her. I know she does not like crowds. Some day, with the temple, she must face people freely. On the other hand it was tragic. No doubt, her past life has attributed to this phobia. Perhaps I will endeavor to bring her to more events. The crowd had a duel, a bikini show, and a friendly auction. Amazingly, Elca showed up with some sort of Zabrak bodyguard. Odd…

I sat with scarlet watching the festivities. She leaned into me and once she was done with her datapad, she leaned her head back and asked if we could part. I nodded and we bid our farewells. We traveled along the shoreline and out into the water on our swoops. Finally, curving back to land and a flat spot nestled by palms. Scarlet erected a tent, and I sent Stampy to stand guard, not being too familiar with the area.

We spoke of Kimbrya’s passing, and one of her last tasks for Scarlet; to send a letter to both Deomo and Cauil. It occurred to me that this would be a perfect time to tell her what Fryshka told me about the temple and I, what part I was to play. Then, she began to talk about Avios. Avios? My son? Scarlet said he was so like me, unfortunately, quick to anger, but also skilled with words, very soothing. Avios had the flaw of speaking before he thought, not realizing how deep his words cut. Damn him and his temper. She assured me his intentions were not bad, he just was…immature. At the thought of Avios, my mind quickly turned to Ebe. How lost she has felt as of late, how distant she was to me. Fate, why now? Not while this child is here. This child that may be mine…

Scarlet looked down, then concern hit me. I asked her why she met with Avios. She sighed. Gods she knew, she knew who the father was.

Personal Entry- Revelations Galore

2005-01-22T15:11:00.000-06:00

Gods, it was good to see Scarlet up and about, so much energy…It was time I took her hunting, go train my way…Side by side…

We traveled to Tantooine, to the Squill cave. My proximity radar showed a few other hunters scouring the caves, but not too many in that we would not have creatures to fight. I called Envy to help us in our fight: my two Firecats, fight together with me looking over them.

*pride*

She arched her back in a cat like stretch and nodded to me, indicating she was ready. We stepped into the cave entrance and we soon surrounded by Squills, angry that we had invaded our space. Elsewhere in the cave you could hear the clank of a pike, the screech of a dying Squill, and a poor soul yelling for another pair of vibroknuckers. Seems they broke theirs against a rock wall.

Gods how we shredded through the Squill; my Firecats ripping them to shreds, my pistol shots knocking them down and burning their flesh. We explored freely in the cave, coming across the rare traveler. Odd, we turned a corner and toward us, came a SSS soldier. I recognized him by that insignia on his shoulder. I could sense Scarlet tell Deomo that one of his mates was here with us. Then she told me, he was here as well. How odd…

We continued to hunt and I was hit with distress across the bond. Scarlet said that Deomo had cracked his helmet fighting and needed a new one. We turned a corner and he was there. I stood back giving them their space. Scarlet handed Deomo her spare helmet. We soon continued to fight, and get Scarlet experience with her Terra Kais skills. I stood back and lobbed grenades over her head, dropping them on her target.

“No, let her do it by herself, she needs the practice.”

What?!?!?! Who the kark does he think he is intruding on my time with her, telling me how I should train her? I have always, ALWAYS, given them a wide berth when they were together, even at times, leaving the planet. I told Scarlet I would leave, I even turned away to hike out of the cave. She stopped me and said this was my time with her. This was too much…

“Max, I am sorry. She is with you, I apologize for intruding, train her as you see fit.”

*shock*

Gods, the man, err Zabrak I once order assassins to take out…apologizing to me? The Zabrak with whom I could not stand to be in the same room with…apologizing to me? I was at a loss for words. Scarlet and I talked a bit as I am sure my face reflected my confusion. We hunted a bit more as my warning timer went off. It was time for us to leave, our medical enhancements would soon expire.

We ran for the cave entrance, trailing tons of Squill after us. I told Scarlet to jog out, to only run on my command. She got a bit outnumbered, and I could not catch up to her to engage her tormenters or heal her. I panicked a bit. Then, starlight…We were out. Luckily the majority of the Squill focused on me as Scarlet put a bit more distance between herself and the cave. She dispatched one last Squill as I focused on those around me. I ran to her once I was done and stood by her on the mesa top. I quickly dispatched my cambot and took a picture of us, framed by the stars, awash with the moonlight, Envy at our feet.

*love, pride*

We drove all the way to Mos Eisley, enjoying the nightsky, canvassed by the multitude of stars. I arrived at the starport only to notice Scarlet was not there. I checked my proximity monitor and drove to her location, a gravesite, outside the city. War…death…so sad…All of the unfound hatred causing the likes of Kimbrya to be taken, prematurely. I wish it were not so. Scarlet meditated and I knelt to honor the fallen: soldiers, families, innocents…

Arriving back at the starport, we boarded her Sorosub for Theed. We both had business there. Scarlet needed to speak with Elca, and I with Honney about some furniture. Honney whispered to me, “Does she show you the affection you deserve?”

*shock*

What….why did Honney care so? She has a husband, she knows my feelings for Scarlet. She apologized for intruding; quickly realizing she had stepped into something she should not have.

Good, Elca had agreed to watch the temple. Honney mentioned that she may open a mall. Perhaps I will offer my experience to her. I felt discomfort from Sacrlet. We quickly went to a shuttleport and headed for Hendola. I got her inside and she winced in pain. Gods Taishan what is wrong? I closed my eyes and reached for the bond, anything to try to determine what is wrong with her. Kark!!! The child!! I reached for the energy, her child, maybe…our child. I opened my arms to it offering myself to her. I felt comfort and a warmth emanate from it. The energy relaxed, Scarlet relaxed. The pains are the child, and by some means with the bond, I can comfort the two of them. Deomo must know, he must know of this.

She laid in my arms, purring, content. My arms cradling my Taishan…My mind’s arms cradling what I hope is our child, our baby girl. Two loves being held close, I will never let go…

Personal Entry-Truth: A Bantha hoof to the head

2005-01-22T11:58:00.000-06:00

I laid Scarlet down to rest. She may tell me she is fine, that, “She is Zabrak.” She is still with child, a frail being in her womb. Scarlet needs to take it easy. She has promised me she would but like any wild animal she is not easily caged *grin*. The only roof that makes her happy at times is one dotted with stars and moons. I hope that Deomo does not push her too much in her training. He seems to have assumed the role of her trainer. I just hope he realizes she is not an Imperial protie, that she is a woman, a Zabrak, and carries…the child to one of us.

Again, I found myself drawn to Fryshka’s shrine. Hopefully she will not speak in riddles. Without the spice my mind is much clearer. I can hear her much better. We spoke at length about many things. Some disturbing, some, well actually quite joyous. I do not know why, but I knew or felt much of what Fryshka said already. I asked her about the child.
“You know in your heart who’s it is”

I asked her about my role in the temple. Why I was called here, what good I could possibly provide.

*shock*

She told me. I already knew the truth.

Personal Entry- Next Chapter

2005-01-21T10:29:00.000-06:00

There was much that needed to be done today. One of which, and probably something I have been avoiding, was speaking to Brem and giving him the bracelets that Kimbrya gave to me. I contacted him and we met in the Theed cantina. Deciding discretion would be appropriate; I suggested we go into a back room to talk. He is not dumb, he knows what we were meeting about.

The pain was evident upon his face. I was at a loss for words really. I told him of Mystyn and how death affects us all. I was powerless to save her, much as Brem was with Kimbrya. Mystyn was ill, deathly ill. Kimbrya was as well but it was a painless malady. To know that Kimbrya’s passing was peaceful, that, she welcomed it…I have seen life leave many people’s eyes. Never like this…To see someone pass to be one with the Force, is awe inspiring. I wonder…Was there a reason I was to be the one to witness it? Did someone…something have an ulterior motive? What was it to open my eyes too? I will have to think on this…

Brem seemed to be doing ok. I think he was trying to keep himself together for my sake, not wanting to show weakness in front of me, Zabrak…proud species…I do not know what it is about him. Ever since his trial I have felt a connection with him, almost as if he was my…son. Why am I surrounded by all of these Zabrak? *laugh*

Scarlet commed me and I told her to come to the Theed cantina if she was feeling up to it, that I was speaking with Brem, and that she needed to as well. I sensed her approach and felt her hesitation at the door. I told Brem to come with me outside. Scarlet looked a little weak but a smile broke across her face at the sight of Brem. I told them I had things to do in order to grant them space, and time to revisit their friendship. I know it has been too long.

There was another to speak too. Deomo. For once, anger was not consuming my mind. I knew what had to be done, what I must do. I met him on Dantooine, rather I tracked him down to a lair. He was fighting side by side with Fire’Fly. Damn, Scarlet and I need to move forward with Fire’Fly sometime…Deomo ordered her to grant him some privacy…Odd, perhaps a training mission…We spoke about Scarlet and what our issues do to her. That, for her sake, and her child’s (who’s ever it may be), we must begin to get along. Not just tolerate each other in passing, we must move beyond that. I think Deomo had at least gotten to that point, and I know I have, my hand no longer hovers above my sidearm when he is nearby. Concerned that I may not reach him, and also to give him something tangible to remember our conversation with, I gave him two Nightsister Lances I purchased in Hendola. Not knowing much about polearm tactics, I tried to select Lances that had special abilities that I thought would assist him the best when facing an enemy: man or creature. One lance was blessed with a flame attack that targeted one’s mind; a wicked spell indeed. Then I sensed a wave of dark come over him. Almost like an eclipse, slowly moving across a sun’s surface. Through my bond with Scarlet I could feel his struggle. Remembering my dream I latched my armor on and drew my pistol. I moved to my speeder. I did not want to put him down, not after our talk, it just seemed…Wrong. For him, for us, and for Scarlet, I would run. A simple sacrifice of pride for something greater. He regained his balance, and said all was fine. I approached him, and then extended my hand to his, an offer of the human gesture of shaking hands in order to seal an agreement. Oddly enough, his hand was rising at the same time as mine. We shook.

A new chapter has begun…

Personal Entry- Refocus

2005-01-20T14:19:00.000-06:00

What an evening…pain, shame, love…One of these days I would love to get through an evening with no major events, no deep thoughtful talks…

I woke and was soon greeted by the chattering of Deomo and Scarlet hunting together. Strange, this recent awareness of his bond with her is making my TaiShan bond with her intrusive at times. Granted, I have long since come to terms with her feelings for him, and vice versa. The current situation… I wish things were different, I wish there was not this uncertainty. But, that cannot be changed. Things are as they are, and I must come to grips with that. Regardless of how the future may play out, my love for Scar’let will remain unchanged.

There is much ahead of us. The child, Scar’let’s training…Kimbrya charged me with ensuring she becomes more focused. Things have been chaotic lately, I have not helped matters. I know Deomo sense the need for her to be focused as well. He enjoys hunting with her. I never seem to have the time too… then there is Kimbrya, the funeral…Scar’let does not have the strength right now for such a morbid event. Perhaps together, Brem and I can establish a ceremony worthy of honoring her, surprise Scar’let with it. Kimbrya was a loving soul. A sad, morbid event is unacceptable. It will be a celebration of life, a time to be thankful for how Kimbrya has touched us all. Yes, I think we will, assuming Brem is up for it. Scar’let deserves the help, she needs the help. She also needs to learn that I will not allow her to shoulder all of the responsibility of the Temple. She needs the help, and I will ensure she gets it.

To Do List:

Meet Brem
Meet Deomo
Ensure Scar’let meets Elca
Take Scar’let away for a break, just the two of us, to heal each other
Research rites of commitment
Ensure item from Temple remains in hiding until the time is right.

Personal Entry- Aftermath

2005-01-19T16:26:00.000-06:00

I sat with my head in my hands just staring. Staring at all that was left of the most caring, kind, loving, and gentle soul. For some reason I was drawn to the holocron and stowed it in my pack. It belongs to the Temple, and will be returned, in time. I must assure it is safe. Tears streamed down my cheeks as Scar’let entered. She nodded to me and sat beside me. We cried together. We spoke of the loss and what Kimbrya has gained. Deep down, I think we both realize she is in a better place, a free place, the place that represents the Beginning and the End, she is one with the Force.

Scar’let wanted to get out of the Temple. For now, it weighed heavily on her heart. I more than understood. We launched into space aboard her sorosub. She seemed so frighten, so scared. She wanted to speak to me about something but was hesitant. It was Deomo, the pendant, and her unborn child. All very difficult issues for her to talk to me about, I have no doubt.

The Pendant- Apparently, Deomo has realized what the Pendant is doing. The only concern now is if he has the will to fight it.

Deomo and I- Hatred? Yes, not for the man, but for what he represents. I have seen nothing but a mindless, bloodthirsty Imperial Soldier. He tortured Kimbrya until she lost her unborn child, Brem’s child. He betrayed us by turning me in, knowing full well of Cauil’s deceit. He knew what was to happen to me once Cauil got his hands on me. Surely Scar’let sees this too. Perhaps she is too blinded by her desire to find the good in him. No matter, it is her choice to look, not mine. Thus far he has demonstrated the person he is. He lives because Sacr’let wishes it, and…needs him too. *pain* At the first sign of him becoming a threat or further deceit, his head will become a fine addition to my trophy room. I know she loves him. I have come to accept that. However I do know he would sooner have me dead, so I remain ever vigilant of his intentions.

The Child- This puts us all in a difficult position. Regardless of who’s it is, I will do what is right, what is best for the child; even if that means leaving Scar’let to Deomo, and living my own life.

*sacrifice*
*A man must do what is right, which is often not what is Easy.”

I will always love Scar’let. It is doubtful I would have the desire to be with another after her. My child or not, my love for her will not falter. One time or another, we must all put someone else before ourselves.

Personal Entry- Fate Chooses Death

2005-01-19T09:39:00.000-06:00

The Force is an ambiguous thing. It is assumed that there is a master plan, something to create balance throughout, apparently, at no concern of the costs involved. Last night an Innocent died. I was there. I saw her pass from this world, and move to another.

I have seen death before; from Imperial Troopers to the death caused by my own hands. I have seen the life leave the eyes of my friends, my loved ones...I have also seen the fear leave an enemy's eyes as they slowly pass to another place.

Some how, I knew, tonight was to be the night for her. I do not know if the temple had whispered it to me, or if the Force told me. Why was I to be the one that was there? Why was I chosen? She stood at Fryshka's shrine concentrating, a few small words escaped her lips, a chant of some sort. She was holding a holocron. She noticed my intrusion and said I could stay when I turned to let her be. Kimbrya gave me her medical droid and her swoopbike. I promise Kimbrya, a good home, both will have. *smile* I drove with Scar'let last night on your swoop, I do not know if she recognized it as being yours. Kimbrya also gave me braclets that Brem had given her, to return to him. That will not be easy for him I am sure. He should have been there last night. He will undoubtedly be upset he wasn't. I will have to do what I can for him. Scar'let cannot, she has enough to deal with. After she gave me the braclets she kneeled back down with the holocron in her hands, chanting a bit. An electricity filled the air, a peaceful energy flowed and ebbed around me, rushing towards her, and then...

"...And thus do I commit the lessons and knowledge of those gone before me to this holocron.

May their wise words and secret teachings be available to all those who need to hear them...

Free-Spirit Temple...

A Temple for all Free Spirits,

to live, and worship, and believe as they choose.

For there is no one way

All Faiths are valid

All paths are the Force

There is no Death, there is only the Force.

Peace...

So mote it be..."

Her terran form disappeared. Kimbrya had returned from whence she came, where we all came from. She became one with the Force.

"Thank you Maxell, Blessings"

Gods, Kimbrya, you will be missed by all. I will do what I can for Scar'let and the Temple. That is now my duty. No matter where it takes me, it will be done.

Honor is the law, Love is the bond.

Personal Entry- Release

2005-01-18T10:55:00.000-06:00

I woke concerned that I had fallen asleep out in the wild and was rained on. Then it hit me, I am not in the wild, I am in the cave. I am not lying in a puddle. The moisture I feel is my own sweat. Gods, what has happened? Why am I here?

*for her and her child*

Then it hit me. The spice…I reached into my bag for a container of Muon. Looking at it curiously I rolled it around in my hand, studying it from all sides.

*rage*

I throw it up into the air and before it can begin its downward decent, my FWG5 is pulled and a single shot sends it shattering into nothingness. The gun is holstered before the first shard hits the ground.

*No more*

My thoughts return to the one thing that has consumed my mind during its waking hours: Scar’let’s child. Deomo must know. I had considered not telling him, but Scar’let would have once she discovered the truth. How easy it would be to have him killed, raise the child as my own, regardless of if it is or not. Even after all that has happened to me, I cannot bring myself to do such a horrid thing.

“Sometimes, a person has to do what is right, versus what is easy.”

This is right, telling him is right. To hell with meeting him face to face. I cannot even stomach that. To tell a lover of the one I love her child may be his, or mine? No thank you. A simple comm. letter will do. I doubt he would do the same. Deomo seems to have issue with the right versus wrong concept. Everything to him is an order, if it is an order, it is right. I sent him a message then contacted Scar’let via our bond. I could sense her close and could tell she was troubled. She does not know yet. She…did not take it as well as I would have thought. Scar’let was concerned with Deomo and I, not herself as she should be. Deomo was battling the Pendant, but did not seem to realize it. I picked up whispers of his struggle from my bond with Scar’let.

“Go to him Scar’let, he needs you.” She looked at me in shock.

“Sometimes, a person has to do what is right, versus what is easy.”

She would not leave me in my state. I was wounded, badly from my ordeal, but could move and felt reenergized from the lack of poison in my system. Deomo was on Dantooine. I flew ahead to ensure her flight path would be clear. The pirates were no match for my focused rage. The outpost was soon cleared out for Scar’let’s arrival. She insisted I get myself healed. I reached into my pack and began to pull on my flight suit. I struggled. Suddenly, she was behind me. Scar’let smiled at me and reached up and helped me with the suit.

*love*
I left her to deal with Deomo. Once healed, I searched out Ebe. She had to know too. I told her of the baby, and she was excited for me!! *shock* What I did not expect was her anger once I told her of Deomo, and the possibility it was his. I hope Scar’let has the patience to explain to her what is going on. I could not. My anger clouded my words. Again to my shock Ebe surprised me once more, she offered to be Scar’let’s midwife. Gods, that woman…Such strength, such nobility. What a kind heart. She knows nothing but love for others. I welled with pride when she told me of her offer. I could think of no one better suited for the task. I hope Scar’let considers her offer of help.

Mind of Maxell Snow- Cold Kaadu

2005-01-17T15:23:00.000-06:00

Why do the cold dark places fascinate me the most? Why am I drawn into space, and now, drawn to this place? No sounds but the dripping of water on the cave floor: constant, never changing… Amazing to think my time with Cauil may have done me good. It may have strengthened me enough to withstand what I am feeling now. The pain is nothing comp…

*searing pain and nausea wrack his body*

*FLASH!!*

A cloudy image of the temple consumed my mind. Scar’let: standing before a crowd of people. I: having to stand in the back at the building terminal to manage security. I see a crowd of people watching her speak in, silent as they consume her words. Pride fills my being as I watch the Priestess glow in her role.

*FLASH!!*

Laser fire, claws and teeth flashing…Battle…Bloodlust, the Dance of Death. Sword flashing as it swirls around her black skirt, bellowing in the wind of her fury. Flesh hanging from the jaws of a Tuskcat, blood upon its fur. The feral breathes; all consuming. Such focus and determination, with a hint of rage.

*FLASH!!*

Ebe standing in a doorway, a small child holding her hand. It is Avios, so young, so pure, hair as black as hers once was, his eyes as blue as mine. His eyes gleamed with the innocence of one not yet touched by the impurities of the world. Ebe smiles at me.

*FLASH!!!*

*Darkness consumes Maxell’s mind*

Deomo, standing before Scar’let, who is badly beaten and injured. He holds a carbine in his hand with the muzzle pointed into her belly. “Not even that can help Deomo,” an odd sounding voice mumbled from Deomo’s lips.

*FLASH!!!*

My hand grips the throat of Cauil as his pleas for mercy hit my ears and rolls off like his blood rolls off of my knuckles. My fingers dig into his flesh and begin to feel the warmth of his blood coat them. His pleas soon become chokes as I can feel his windpipe in my grasp. Pulling and twisting, his eyes begin to look off in the distance, searching for a reason as to how this could have happened, how he….

*FLASH!!!*

I hear the crunch of Deomo’s corpse as my AT-ST trooper guides his vehicle to stride across his body. Finally it is over, everything, everyone, dead…No one is in my way, no one but…

*FLASH!!!*

*the pain stops*

A baby cries, Scar’let comes from a backroom of the temple to check on the basinet left close enough to the fire for warmth but not too close. Her mane of fire-red hair is unkempt; she seems stressed yet is overflowing with joy. She picks up the child which quickly nuzzles her chest, indicating its hunger. She shrugs a shoulder of her dress off exposing one of her breasts for it. She cradles it to her bosom as she softly hums to it. How odd, a human nursery rhyme, yet the baby, is it? Can it be?

My mind’s eye snaps open at the image and I try to peer into my own dream, trying to discover the truth. Then…DAMN!!!! Woken by a passing speeder…

Was it human or Zabrak? Why Gods? Why do you torture me so?

Personal Entry- Drying Out

2005-01-16T22:21:00.000-06:00

This may be my last entry for awhile. I have to do what I can to rid myself of this spice. Today I will sequester myself from society until I have rid my body of the spice. Painful, yes it will be very. I have no choice now. Scar'let and her child will need me. Deomo is in no shape to protect. He questions everything after some sort of recent failure. Weak fool, with failure, always comes strength. If he would have listened to Brem's rite he would have known this. Instead his childish anger clouded his mind and he was closed to my words. No matter, I was foolish to ever consider leaving her in anyone's hands but my own. I love her and could never let her go. Regardless of what is thrown at us. The past several weeks have proven this to me.

A friend, Cym, has shown me a solution to my problem. I will take her up on her offer, and use one of her facilities. She is a unique woman, strangly focused for a female, even a female rifleman in the Imperial Army. Perhaps I will learn something of her. Assuming I can do anything in the state I will be in during the next few days.

Remember Scar'let I love you, always and forever. *love, trust*

Personal Entry- Hunger

2005-01-15T21:40:00.000-06:00

I travlled to Theed intent on stocking up on my favorite spice, Muon. The only buyer I could find was a guy named Hauke. Bastard, tried to sell me spice...Not with that emblem on his arm. Another member of SSS. Damn them. We started exchanging words when Scarlet came in. She begged me to leave. How could she even understand my hatred for them? Can't she feel it? Can't she sense it across the bond? Perhaps, her mind is elsewhere, on someone else...Deomo. Her precious other TaiShan. Why does she bother with me? She pulled me from the cantina, Hauke laughing as I left. I raged at her outside and she, she just walked away.

*pain*

*TaiShan please help me. The spice, I do not know what it is doing to me, it has been, it has been too long without some.*

Sensing my need she returned and took me to the temple, being sure I went with her on her ship to ensure I did not sneak some that may have been stored on my Tie. We entered the temple and a peace washed over me as it has before. We spoke at great length about us, my health, the spice. I knew I should quit, but it is just so hard. Look at me now? It has only been a few days. Damn, she passed out again. Fyrshka's words come back to me:

"Clean yourself up and figure it out yourself."

Gods, I have tried, but I am so weak to it. Perhaps there is one way, perhaps I will have someone lock myself away. That may be the only way. I carried her down to our bedroom and tried to feel across our bond for something, for anything. then I felt it, something was there, an energy, a being? I could not tell. I pleaded with it, asking why it haunts Scar'let, why it is there. A wave of fear and weakness eminated from it as it cringed from me. Shocked I retreated from the bond. I then went to Fyrshka's shrine to plead for guidance, not knowing where else to turn.
She spoke to me. she told me of the feeling I sensed within Scar'let. My gods, how could I have been so blind??!?! Damn this spice, it has clouded my mind's eye to this. Pregnant. With a child. How could I have done this to her? Make her worry for me? Make her waste her strength on me. I asked Fyrshka why she is doing this, why she talks to me. She said she is my teacher. A teacher of what? To what end? No matter, my concern now is Scar'let and our...kark...child...
Deomo...Deomo was with her as well...no matter. He is irrelevant to me. She is all that matters. No more spice, no more drink. For her, everything...

Personal Entry- Thoughts

2005-01-14T21:07:00.000-06:00

Clean myself up? Why? If something was wrong with Scar'let she would tell me...Unless...she didn't know something was wrong. Perhaps Fyrshka is right. Here I am right back at the beginning, Maxell, The Protector. Hmmm, maybe, maybe that is my role in life. Why not? If people are unable to stand up for themselves, someone has too. Someone needs to help those in need. Perhaps Fyrshka is right...

I noticed a shimmering light about Scar'let. One she did not seem to perceive. Odd that she did not notice it. She caught a sense that Deomo was in trouble. She focused, I lent her my strength, what little there was of it. The spice tends to sap you of your energy. She hit a wall, from that pendant I think. The Shadow Ancestors from within. A look came over her. An odd look. Then she spoke: "Scar'let has unfinished business with Deomo and the pendant." Then she fainted. I took her downstairs. then, not knowing what to do I stumbled into Fyrshka's shrine, hoping for some guidance. Instaed, all I got was mroe riddles, more vaugness, and was told once again the need of ridding myself of the spice, for Scar'let's sake. Damn this temple and its voices.

Personal Entry-Fear and a Spirit's Voice

2005-01-13T20:39:00.000-06:00

I made sure to take my own Tie Fighter to Dantooine to meet Scar'let to hunt. That way, I could sneak some Moun while she was not there. She does not need to know, it isn't her business. We went hunting then she took me to Wander's End to see a zoo Fyrshka once had, but is now owned by another. Animals galore! How fun!! So peaceful...that is, until we hit the basement level...

bars...bars, cages, confinement...I could sense the fear of the animals. It reverbrated throughout my body, reminding me of my imprisionment. I raged, then my instincts turned on, driving me from that place, I ran and ran. Slamming into the town hall quite by accident, I slumped to the ground, crouched, waiting for an attacker, like a cornered animal. Lost in my feral felling, the muon enhancing my senses, I could hear her getting on her speeder to look for me, I could hear her turn it on, its engines revving. I could hear the sound fade then grow stronger as she frantically searched for me. I could...taste...her fear *smirk, lick lips*

She found me, appearing from the corner abruptly. It startled me back into a deep fearful place. Lost in the feelings and memories of the SSS camp. I watched her as she curiously removed her armor. She stepped to me, and knelt, her hand extended, palm up. I took it curiously. Doesn't seem to be a threat, I tried to remember...*Tai'Shan* I follow her to the temple. Upon entering, a peacefulness washes over me. I remember. Oh gods, what have I done?

I throw up. Scar'let runs for a bucket for me. I try to focus but I cannot keep anything down. Then I hear her.

"Scar'let needs your help. She cannot clone again. The last time was very risky."

What!?!?! what in the gods does this mean? Is she suffering from the same cloning problems that Kimbrya is? Tell me you infernal spirit. Stop with these damned riddles!!! What is wrong with her???

"Clean yourself up and figure it out for yourself."

Personal Entry- Rejection, Failure

2005-01-12T19:19:00.000-06:00

Damn the Empire!!! How will I ever escape? How can the possibly believe I will work for them to the best of my abilities after what Cauil has done to me and those around me? But the rebels...idiotic ragtag bunch of thieves and terrorists. Scarlet calls herself a rebel, but she does not participate in the larger scale war...No one holds the answers...

*smashes liquor bottle against the wall and opens another one*
What in the hell is left for me? I am in love, and 'bonded' to a rebel Zabrak that is also bonded to another Zabrak. How can I compete with that? She still has feelings for him even after all he has done to Kimbrya and myself. Her blindness to his hatred and darkness kills me everytime she speaks of him. It is as if he is standing beside me, a knife in my back twisting as he slowly whispers his feelings for her into my ear. No wonder I have revisited my old taste of Muon...the smooth aroma, the strength you feel in your mind. There is nothing quite like it. When mixed with some alcohol, all your worries leave you. No one matters, you feel no pain. Only the now. I do not have to remember the torture, Scarlet's love for another, Mystyn's death, Ebe's shame in me. Nothing matters. Life throws too much at us all. It is amazing we are allowed any solace. The muon grants me this. I will never let go of this feeling. My life is my own. To hell with everyone else!!! Scarlet can go running off to Deomo, she will be fine. No one else needs me, she doesn't even need me. I am my own soul. To hell with this. This life, this path. I think I may dust off my old stormtrooper armor and join the ranks of the grunt. A simple life. No one to answer to but your commanding officer. Only one thing in life to do, kill what is placed before you.
*hiss of Muon is recorded as the entry is closed*

Official Communication: Empire to Maxell

2005-01-11T18:18:00.000-06:00

To Agent Mxell Snow

Re: Response to Rquest for Rsignation

We regret to inform you that we are unable to release you from your responsibilities at this time. Contine with your mission identified as mission PX89222. No other missions will be assigned to you in the meantime. We hope that you take this opportunity tosort out any hinderances to your duty. You are a valuable asset to the team. We would loose a worthy peer with your absence.

Captain Sixton Nyefall

Personal Entry- Cool Down

2005-01-10T18:16:00.000-06:00

I sit in the Theed cantina watching fools run in to ogle at the entertainment, throw them money, and express their love to any beauty in a skirt. The poor ladies, I pity them. Another empty beer bottle. I knew my vision was getting blurry and that I was quickly becoming drunk. Honney walked in to begin to dance. She is such a nice girl. I am glad to see she has gotten back together with her husband. We talked a bit, then I felt sick so I ran out. I sat against a building in hopes that my head would clear. Honey must have been following me for as I lifted my head she was there. We talked at length, I was, unfortunantly mean to her. Ifelt Scarlet contact me via the bond but I told her to see Deomo. I did not want her to see my in my current state. Her Taishan, a human, weak, frightened, and drunk. Duped by Colonel Cauil, not being able to see his own game being played on himself. Perhaps my love of Scarlet has blinded my eyes, and clouded my judegment. Perhaps she would be, as well as the Temple, if I were to refocus on what is happening, and she continues her life without me, perhaps, Deomo instead.

Honney must have called ebe because she soon showed up. She shook her head in shame at my condition and she insisted I went home. Honney and Ebe discussed my well-being as I sat wondering what I should do.

“Another reason why we are no longer together.”

The shock of Ebe’s words, and the shame I felt jarred me back into reality.

Scarlet contacted my again via the bond, this time, panicked, in pain. Gods, she had died, was cloned and now sat wounded and confused in a cloning center. I focused my mind and quickly sobered up enough to travel to her and help her. Had I caused this? Had she felt my shame and my doubts of us? I could barely hold my head up to her I was so ashamed at my thoughts.

We travelled to my house and talked. It pained me to see the worry in her eyes. What have I done?

Official Communication: Maxell to the Empire

2005-01-09T18:13:00.000-06:00

To the Office of the Imperial Inquisitor

Re: Resignation

This message is an official request to be released of all duties pertaining to planet side responsibilities with the Imperial Navy. Recent events have limited my functionality in my current role. I am unable to complete routine duties due to involvement and harassment from other Imperial Divisions. At your convenience I will report to you and hand over all sensitive materials.

Freedom; Mind of Maxell Snow

2005-01-08T14:47:00.000-06:00

Light flooded the room as my tormentor strode in. The machine's low, dull hum continued. The pain, continued. I could feel her somewhere. She was worried and concerned, yet strangely determined and focused. It suddenly occurred to me that I may have weakened her so much be calling upon her feral nature via the bond, that she would be foolish and run into a fight foolishly.

Odd, Cauil had a pained look upon his face. His clothing was burned badly in places, and sliced open in others.
Battle, I could smell it on him; his blood, his pain…

*feral*

I feigned being passed out as he approached me. Perhaps this would afford me the opportunity to finish what someone else had started. He slowly reached for the chair’s manacles.

*confusion*

He released them and before he could get a word out, my FWG5 was in my hand. Foolish guards…You should always search your prisoner. Up from the chair I lunged, only to fall to my knees in pain. The days of torture had taken their toll. I was in no shape to fight, yet, he was so close. So very close.

*rage, feral*

I crawled for his feet, anything of his that I could grip, so I could render him to nothingness with the force of my anger. Nothing…

“You have been released, you are free to go if you have the strength.”

*rage, animalistic instincts scream a trap*

Despreatly I crawl for him, able to get the strength to rise to my knees. Cauil grabbed my pistol from me.

*Tai’Shan, I am here. Come outside*

Then I smelled her. The smell of a warrior who is mastering the Dance of Death. The smell of my love, the one for which all this is for. My Tai’shan. Memories flooded back into my head..

*flash*
Hunting along side her, healing her as I blast away with my pistol and bark orders to Envy
*flash*
Her rite on Lok*
*flash*
Up on the top deck of my ship, together*
*flash*
MY house, swimming in the pool
*flash*
The Temple, Fyrshka’s shrine, Scar’let’s whispers of love.

Cauil opened the outer door to the holding cells. There, standing upon the entry way, her battle dress put away, her sword sheathed, she stood. Cauil strode out and returned my pistol to me.

“Go away from here with her. You are now free." Then he stood there.

*hate, rage, bloodthirst*

I charged him then Scar’let stepped into my path. Damn, her, what is she doing? Why won’t she let me at his throat?

*move Tai’shan, let me end this*
She stood her ground and shook her head no. She spoke of a promise to Cauil. A promise to Cauil?!?! Was I betrayed by yet another??!?! Scar’let calmly turned towards him and told him to leave us, return to his holding cells and lock the door. SLAM!!! Damn her! I rushed the door trying to get in; clawing scratching, raging at the durasteel keeping me from my prey. Why did she let him go?

*Tai’Shan please, leave here with me, it is time we should leave*
My mind was slammed with worry from her, she began to falter. Whatever had previously happened had begun to take its toll on her mind. The pain in my Tai’Shan’s eyes opened my own eyes. I was out, free, no more pain, no more restraints. She held her hand out to me, palm facing up. How deep in the feral am I to have her do what I once did for her so that she would trust me?

I must focus for her. Pull myself back. The rage ebbed and I took her hand as she smiled.

We jumped on our speeders and drove out. I had no idea what direction. Suddenly she asked me to stop. I did, and as I stumbled off of my bike, I turned around and was face to face with Ebe.
*confusion*
Ebe smiled at me and hugged me, glad that I was free. She was glowing yet had that steely determined look I have seen on her face on so many hunts before. The pain she can inflict on creature and Rebel alike. It is awe inspiring. She was in that deep zone of focus, I recognized the Talusian camo kit she wore across her shoulders. Is Ebe hunting?

“Follow us at 300 meters. Alert me if we are followed.”
Ebe nodded and disappeared into the undergrowth as only a Master Ranger can. Scar’let then picked up her comm..
“Yes, we are returning now, yes I have him. Clear the base and secure the perimeter.”

Scar’let? Is…giving orders? How long was I detained? What has occurred in my abscense?

*Tai’shan, we must be on our way, set your speeder to follow me*

I nodded, not wanting to question what was going on…Yet. We soon arrive to the Talusian Imperial Base, welcomed by the sounds of blaster fire, and a smell. That smell, flesh being scorched by the heat of a light saber. A Jedi!! Here!!?!? My gods we were under attack. I looked at Scar’let questioningly, probably with a look of panic on as I reached into my pack that was on my speeder for my armor.
*Get down, and stay down*
I dropped to the ground. Avios?!! Here? He smiled at me with a certain glow I have never seen from him. I wish I could sense anything from him, damn this lack of empathy. My son, my ex-wife for whom I care greatly still, my Tai’shan: one mind, body, and spirit…Together…
A few well trained rebels stood side by side of a jedi decimating the Imperial forces. Serves them just as well. I relished the site of death spreading across the same faces that turned their back on me as Deomo paraded me through the base. Once it was all over the small band cheered and congratulated Scarlet. She blushed. Ebe hugged me, joyed that I was free. Then, Ebe and Scar’let hugged each other. Gods…A sight I thought I would never see. Everyone was parting ways, then I saw him, unaware of my gaze boring through his back. I readied my FWG5 for one well placed shot at the base of his skull.

*No Tai’shan, you mustn’t…A life for a life, yours for his.*

I closed my eyes trying to quell the feral calling to me. Luckily he boarded his shuttle before I opened them back up. I could feel Scar’let waiver. I thanked everyone for their help, even though I knew not what had occurred. Scar’let and I returned to the Temple, her exhausted, me: tired and confused. We talked of what happened.

*you gave orders Tai’shan?* *pride*

I grinned as she blushed. She tried to fuss at me for making that her rite. I tried to focus long enough to tell her what I knew, what I think she learned. Scar’let learned that she can be a leader, that, at times, she must be one. Tonight, I think she did, under the most dire of circumstances.

Now, to figure out why Fyrshka told me what she did, how she knew it would turn out well. Why she is doing this to us…but that will have to wait another time. Tonight, I will sleep in my lover’s arms…never to let go again.

*love*

Torture: Day 3; Mind of Maxell Snow

2005-01-08T14:00:00.000-06:00

I do not know when I passed out during the night. The hum of the machine I had a hand in creating was oddly silent.

*needle stuck into arm*
"We will need to administer this IV drip to him to keep him alive during the upcoming days. The body tries to shut down to protect the mind. We cannot allow that to happen."

My eyes bolt open to see Him before me again, Cauil...

*salivate at the sight of his exposed flesh*

...thoughts of sinking my teeth into his flesh and thrusting my hand into his chest to touch his beating heart...the warmth of his insides, his blood coating my arm and dripping to the floor. "Look at the blood dripping on the floor Cauil. Does it remind you of someone? A poor innocent girl? A girl who's unborn child you aborted by your order...did her blood drip on the floor too? Did you grin at the sight of the mess as I am grinning at your face as it slowly looses color?"

*whisper* Cauil...

I hear the hum of the machine kick back on as the pain slowly begins to course through my body once again.

"Yes, no you must come to him quickly, he is in surgery."

*confusion*

"We need to meet so you can see him."

*rage, struggling against the bonds on the chair, ignoring the pain*

Touch her and your head will be on a pike at the Talus base. My pets will toy with your people, slicing their bellies open, then watching their prey succumb to shock as they sit calmly by, waiting for them to die. I will feast on your soul and the flesh of your men as they scream for death instead of facing my rage.

His eyes met mine. Then he left me to the machine.

*TaiShan!! Ebe, protect her, please*

Torture: Day 2; Mind of Maxell Snow

2005-01-07T13:05:00.000-06:00

Queen's Retreat...crowds of people, a wedding, I am there kneeling before Ebe. She is looking down at me with tears welling up in her eyes. She is smiling. I hear clapping, cheering, it is almost deafening.

**JOLT!!! PAIN, RAGE, FERAL**

Step closer Cauil...let me rid you of that hand. Let me feel the tendons snap as I rip it form your arm...Tasting the blood, tasting the flesh, tasting your fear at what you have created...

**blackness**

The streets of Keren...rushing through them on speeders, Mystyn close behind me. She stops on a hillside. I am circling back to see what is going on. She sets up a small camp on the hillside to take in the view. A sunset, framed by the rolling, green hills of the naboo country side and clear sky. Sitting side by side, talking, laughing. I turn to her wide loving eyes. I slowly move towards her lips, her eyes close, then do mine....

**SHOCK!!! PAIN, NEEDLE IN ARM, IV DRIP, EXTREEM FERAL RAGE, CALLING THE FERAL IN SCAR'LET, REACHING FOR MORE, TOUCHING THE FERAL IN DEOMO VIA SCAR'LET'S BOND WITH HIM, RAGE**

Klink!! Klink!!...Klink!! Argghhh!!! The Dance of Death. A beautiful angel covered in shiny, dark red armor. An angel of vengance and destruction, ultimately tempered only by her beauty and self-control. My Tai'Shan. My lover. My only. One mind, one body, one spirit.

*smile*

I see her joy standing and talking to the wookies about the life day. I see her cute nose as she peers over my pool's edge. I see her get frustrated at her ships controls. I see her smirk as I calmly reach down and press the button she was searching for. I see her in the temple sitting in the main ceremony room. I see her looking down at me as I kneel before the shrine to a fallen friend.

*love, Tai'Shan*

**PAIN, HEAT, ELECTRICITY, BURNING**

*eyes close*

*grin*

You will never beat me Cauil, I will never break. Stop wasting your time and mine. Kill me now, I fear nothing, not you, not death, not my future...

Torture: Day 1; Mind of Maxell Snow

2005-01-06T21:42:00.000-06:00

That voice had said to trust. Not Scar'let's voice, but another from the temple. I largly dismissed it as whispers from a long dead soul. This was my game. I knew what was before me. I knew what Imperials did to prisioners to extract confessions and information, I am one of the best at doing so. I also know how to withstand their devices. Most, I had a hand in designing. My background as a weaponsmith led to some very interesting breakthroughs in torture devices. My favorite being the Y7G-Synapse Modifier. Around the shop we called it the mind bender. Quite a nasty piece of work. Unfortunantly many of my previous assignments utilizing that device left many a suspected terrorist...well, let's say less than whole...

Light suddenly flowed into my cell from the outer door opening. Voices....familiar...

Shock...I never thought I would see that face turn the corner and peer at me through my bars. He was calm, relaxed, determined. Yet there was a darkness about him...**betrayal, shock**

Reminds me of when the Fates took Mystyn from me. I never saw that coming, one day, she just passed on. Dead...out of my life forever. The memories will remain though. I will always look fondly back on our time together.

He spoke to me, gave me a list of my offenses. There were none so I did not bother reading them. The cell doors open and I am escorted to the chair that I find myself in now. My god...the mind bender, but with some noticable modifications *worry transitions to bravery*

*feral*

*smile* He does not know what he is up against. He thinks simple pain may break me, break my will. *TaiShan...betrayed....Cauil....he betrayed....everything* I did not know...this I did not see coming. However....*trust*...I have asked it of so many, perhaps I should try to do the same.

*glare* Deomo...I knew he was nothing more than Cauil's lapdog. To imagine I helped piece him together not to long ago, I bandaged his wounds and hired an entertainer to ease his mind. the entertainer was there in 10 minutes. All the way from Naboo to Dantooine. Traitor...he betrayed me, he betrayed his Tai Shan...my Tai shan...MY TAI SHAN!!!! *FERAL*

*PAIN*

*growl* Someone will pay for this treachery, blood will be spilled. Their hands will be stained by the blood of my victims. Their sleep will be cursed with the howls of my prey. I will feast at the death I leave in my wake, my pain will be cleansed with destruction. They will be forever looking over their shoulder, unsure of what creeps behind them, weary of what lays ahead...

*PAIN, FERAL*

A hand reaches for me....*SNAP!!!!* Almost...to sink my teeth in my tormentor's flesh, to feels his bones snap from my jaw.... *bloodlust*

*grin*

"16 days is the longest anyone has lasted, a poor Trandosian..."

"16 days? That's all? Stop wasting my time. Do it Deomo, do your duty..."

*SNARL*

Personal Entry- Day of Reckoning

2005-01-05T09:17:00.000-06:00

"You know you must...for her, and for yourself. Trust your Tai'Shan. Do not waiver in your convictions now."

Why not? Waivering would mean gaurunteed survival. Sure I would be hunted, but I have been hunted before, most of my life. Scar'let would have Deomo to help her. He could protect her. Perhaps that is the best option. End the Empire's hunt for the temple. Give them myself, let Scar'let move on to perhaps one better suited to be her Tai'Shan...*sacrifice*

*Tai'Shan!!! Please...help, it is Deomo, he faught Aico, he is badly beaten.* The bond calls, and I must answer...How could I ever turn my back on the bond? Her? Our love? I knew the answer before I responded, *Wait there and be careful*. Jumping on my speeder to meet them at the temple, I contemplated what I was doing. Here I was rushing to help Scar'let's other Tai'Shan, her other lover *pain*, the person tasked with arresting me. What have I become? Why have I not ordered his death and begun my process of disappearing? *duty, honor*

Scar'let had erected a small field base to help with treating his wounds. When I arrived she was frantically rushing around his limp body, trying to stop the bleeding. Her tiny med robot, Pips always underfoot, unsure of where it needed to go. I gently pulled her aside, as I pulled out my comm to call in a favor of an entertainer guild. the dispatched someone to my location as I bagan the task of putting my Tai'shan's lover back together. *pain, honor* Scar'let whispered words to him as I jostled his body, trying to gain access to the massive wounds. She reassured him that everything was fine. He was confused, lost, unsure of where he was or what was going on. I ignored it all, and focused on my work. He was her Tai'shan, as am I. Without him, she is not whole. Without me, she will need him. He must live for her, she will need his strength. Once the dancer arrived we moved him into the Temple. She sat with him and held him in her arms as he weakly peered up to the lithe form moving before him. He began to become coherent from the dancing, his mind healing, remembering...Allowing his duty to be postponed, and having the sight of him in her arms be too much for me, I retreated to the shrine in the basement, giving the spirit of the fallen hero a soft prayer and a few tears.

Scar'let reached to me asking what was wrong, I assured her I was fine and that I would rejoin them once Deomo was in better shape. Once he was I stepped upstairs and out onto the entry way of the temple, looking at the Dantooine sky, knowing this may be my last chance. Scar'let came out, worried. I told her to have faith and be strong. She will be victorious over what is about to be laid before her. A tear formed, then on her, we hugged. It pained me to let go. So much so that I knew at that moment I was not letting go of her forever, that I was not giving up on our bond, our love. Control, I was giving up control of my life and entrusting it with another: my Tai'Shan, my love...Mind, Body, and Spirit, as one.

I suppose Deomo knew to give us some time to ourselves, for shortly after he gingerly sauntered out and stood before me. Face to face with destiny. I offered my hands for the application of his restraints. He asked for my weapons. Foolish...or...trusting, he did not ask for ALL of my weapons nor did he search me. Bad idea. Even though I have willingly offered myself up to this, what may be the final chapter of my life, I do not plan to go easily, or without a fight. He bound my wrists as I sat upon my speeder, and reached to my controls to make my speeder follow his own. Long since I had augmented my speeder with an access code that causes it to only accept commands once it is entered, since he had not, my speeder would not follow. No matter, my word is my bond, I followed him duitfully. We shuttled to Talus. I sensed, remorse...Weak fool. "Do your duty Deomo, for her sake." I would not have his weakness risk her. He escroted me to their city's holding cell. Wow, three imperial bases together, SSS is much stronger then I had imagined. We travelled to the holding cell where he opened the door for me. I stepped inside and sat wit hmy back to the wall, facing outwards towards the door of the cell. How odd, perhaps a long lost instinct of man. Again, he hesitated, pausing when he should have slammed the door shut. Again I told him of his duty, my anger rising that he would risk everything, without thinking. It was done. I was in custody and awaiting my future.

"I love you my Tai'Shan, remember... trust"

Personal Entry- No Arrest???

2005-01-04T21:43:00.000-06:00

They never came. For a time I sat on the Temple steps, just waiting. My comm was activated and was sending a signal to Deomo, telling him my location. Perhaps he was called away on duty. No matter, I am not one to look a gift Ikopi in the mouth...

I felt along my bond for Scar'let. There was confusion and a bit of sadness. "Tai'Shan, I thought to her...I calmly tracked her down and travelled to her on my speeder. I found her standing at a shuttleport, somewhat unattached and distant. Once she saw me, she lit up. I walked to her and held out my hands. "Not today Tai'Shan, let us go hunt." I wanted to see her Dance of Death one more time. I wanted to have a crisp picture of her lithe form dancing with her blade, beckoning her enemies to join her on their dancefloor of destiny. She looked at me with concern and asked if I wanted to get buffed. "No, there is no need." Perhaps it was foolishness, knowing what was soon in store for me. Honestly, it was bravery, to know that I was with her and her steel blade, along with my cats. *smile* my firecats...

I had to just sit back and watch her dance, side by side with Envy, my Fire-red Gurrcat. I was lost deep in thought...Beauty and strength, as one. Every so often she faltered, and I applied a stim to her. She didn't even seem to notice. So sure of herself, and my presence, it was as if she knew she would not fall, that I would not let her. My mind drifted back to the temple and the voice. "Trust, trust in what you have to do, and trust in her." That voice....why does it haunt me? Why am I drawn to it? So lost was I in thought I did not notice the Hurton nipping at my arm as I sat. I passed out momentarily.. I could still sense the panic from the bond as Scarlet saw my predicament. Frantically, she searched her pack for stims. Unable to do find any and unable to turn me over to get to mine, she continued her fight, wracked with worry. "Tai'Shan, I will be fine." I suddenly regained conscienceness and applied first aid to my gashed arm. She turned to me and I slipped a stim into her pack. "Just in case."

We did not need it, not with her strength and willful eye turned towrd me every so often. I focused more on her graceful dance until we were done. Panting she informed me she was tired of fighting for today, that we shoudl do something else. I suggested the temple. On the way back, she wanted to show me something in Eden. Eden? How ironic, a bit too close to the name of my former city, Eden's Grief. She was...for lack of a better word, glowing, she excitedly told me to follow her to the center of the city. There, was a fallen AT-AT in the swamp. Amazing to think of the battle that must have occured here and the strength of the rebels that brought that monstrosity down. I had to get a better look at this. We walked to the water's edge where I begun to shuck my clothing, opting for a swimsuit. I jumped in and began to swim out to the sight before me. I heard...no, felt a whimper across the bond. I stopped to look back at Scarlet, she was pacing the water's edge, desperate to get closer to me. Suggesting she join me she shook her head negatively. Incedible to think this creature that once stood to Sith Lords in a battle, and mroe recently to a hunter's camp of Kunga's, would be scared to swim. I swam back and forth a bit, showing her the ease in it. "Go change Scarlet, change into the suit I gave you for my pool." She sighed and retreated to behind a building, apparently too shy to change in front of me. I snuck out of the water and startled her just as she was putting her top on. She blushed, the warrior blushed... *smile*

I finally coaxed her into the water, little by little. She took to the water like a natural, her graceful form gliding across the surface. We swam out to the AT-AT and then around it. I marvelled at its construction. Always being a fan of ingenius engineering, this was certainly a prime example of such a thing.

Both exhausted we jumped on our speeders and retreated to the temple, not taking our suits off, being dried by the Dantooine air rushing past us. We arrived to the temple, Scarlet before me. I found her standing at the firepit, beaming at a bantha charm sitting on its edge. "Brem" That was enough, I knew she needed some time so I retreated to Fyrshka's shrine. I prayed to her to grant me strength and watch out for Scarlet in my absence which I knew was to soon be upon us. I stood and Scarlet was there looking at my questioningly. I just smiled and motioned for her to join me in our room. We slept, together, for one more night. I will hold the memory of her closeness with me always. It will grant me the strength I will need in the upcoming days.

Personal Entry- Meeting my Future Face on

2005-01-03T11:54:00.000-06:00

Today is the day of my arrest...I waited patiently, even searched out Deomo to turn myself in. No word...I continued to travel around, visiting my favorite spots, walk the streets of Keren, Eden's Grief to smirk at the city that caused me much grief, Scar'let's Temple, my house in Hendola, the house Ebe and I once shared in Eden's Grief, and the place I sat with Mystyn, watching the sunset outside of Keren. All pleasant times. I will miss them, I will miss them all. I especially will miss holding Scarlet in my arms as we chat, her head in my lap as I stroke her head lightly, a soft purr noise emminating from her chest.

I do not know what lies before me. I do know I have no choice. I am guilty of nothing but love and honor. Love of my TaiShan....and honor to my morals. Much time has been spent in my life breaking people, tormenting and causing them to do ill. At times, yes I enjoyed it. It was a fun game. Pulling the marionet strings in others' lives. I fear my zeal for torture will strengthen me too much...that my mind will be able to far outlast my body...I wish...I could feel the empathy, perhaps I could wall off the pain...no matter, I have other strengths to draw on.

Avios-I have watched you grow from a mere child to a man. It makes me proud that you have found enjoyment with your work, that you own and run your own business. You are all a father could ask for in a son. Help your mother. Do what you can to protect her.

Ebe- My love for you knows no bounds. You have taught me much in life. Lessons I hold true to my heart. I will miss our sorties flown in space. I will miss your kisses on my ship hull with your own. *smiles* The nights sitting and chatting will always be with me. Our first date in my house, proposing to you at Grud's first wedding, to our ceremony...we had a wonderful life. It is rare that I admit failure. With you, I failed. Letting go of you was the bigest mistake of my life. You honor me by continuing to be the caring, loving woman you have always been to me.

Mystyn- We shared some wonderful times together. I hurt when I think I lost you to the blackness that consumed your heart. Deep down, I know you are in a better place now, a happier place, for you.

Scar'let- I have no words...No words, from any language can describe the feelings I have for you. you have opened my eyes to a way of life, and a truth that I always recognized, but never fully believed in. You have a strong soul, and an even stronger will. Your faith in life and faith in the good in people will lead you to help many people that cross your path. Do not falter should I fall, have faith. Draw on the strength you contain within. You have learned to better contain your feral nature...reach for your other strengths. At one time, I could feel more within you, I am blinded to it now. Reach for it, walk the path in your mind to that power and harness it. Please...tell Fyrshka I am sorry I failed her. Please watch out for my family should things go bad. I fear for what either of them may do. Both can be headstrong and passionate for those they love. As am I for you....

Journal Entry- Playing with Fire

2005-01-02T14:00:00.000-06:00

I find myself surrounded with conflict. A jabbering fool, Aico, who does nothing besides talk. he thinks he is tormenting people but I, as I hope Scarlet, know him for what he is...a shadow of a threat...
Deomo..I have no words for this man. In the days shortly after this, I must trust that he will protect Scarlet, and not take advantage of a situation. Difficult considering I would sooner have him dead. He has caused much grief in my life, and now...with Scarlet...but it was her choice...Not my place to control...as if I have ever had control...I wonder....I wonder if the words she whispers to me are the same as those she whispers to him? It pains me to think of such a thing. Not today, not this last day...

She met me in the Theed cantina, bowing again, to a good friend of mine, yet not needing too. The dancer chuckled at her, as did I. Rare to see such honor in a cantina. It is not often you see someone bowing at an entertainer unless it is to look up their skirt. We left for my house soon after. I really didn't know what we were going to do. I was just so happy to have her to myself. No rites, no one bothering us...I was the happiest I had been in quite awhile. Proudly, I showed her my meditation room. Deciding I needed a place away from the temple I had been endevouring to create my own place. I showed her my pool, and even enticed her to wade in with me. I know she does not like tha water, but I have decided I will teach her to swim...someday....This was a good first step.

I decided that it was time to face what I felt across our bond. Something had changed, something was different. Her and Deomo... *pain* As of yet, I do not realize why she reaches to him, the TaiShan bond? Is that it, or is there something else? My hand trembled as I reached for my comm to green light the assassination of him when I first realized the truth. I stopped, remembering what his death would do to her. I remembered what is soon to happen to me. I will need him to help her, she will need his strength for what is ahead.

Her rite...cruel, perhaps...but this will test her maybe beyond the limits of her first rite. I know, or...I sense for her to be a leader of the Temple, she must have the strength to endure the worst possible hardship. she will have to utilize her strengths and hopefully, learn some of my skills to get the job done. I have put things in place for myself. Including comm links in various jails all over the galaxy. Extra food and supplies are stored outside of the prision for a potential escape.

She can do it, she has heard me speak of friends...perhaps if she uses them, she will do much better than she fears... I will not waste discovery on a journal entry...All communication will be with my TaiShan. I love you Scarlet, always remeber "trust" and "love". We will always have the bond.

Personal Entry- Questioning this Calling

2004-12-30T09:20:00.000-06:00

This is quickly becoming a task I wish I could dismiss. For any progress made with Scarlet or Brem, the efforts seem to be for naught with Deomo. He has much anger. I am not equipped to deal with such hatred, at least, in a peaceful way...I am glad I anticipated difficulties with Deomo and held Scar'let's rites differently. Hopefully she will now be equipped to help me. I cannot be the one to push Deomo to face his fears. She must. He would surely lash out at me. I will I suppose, have to wait from a distance, in case he turns...He will be put down, he must be taught to understand. If he lashes out at his guide then I will use my own methods. His anger is so great. He will see nothing but the image of my death in his head. Hmmm...Perhaps...Perhaps that is what he may need to see...*looks down in thought* the feeling of betrayal from a Tai Shan, even a weak, newly discovered link is a powerful emotion...Perhaps my death, and Scarlet's sense of pain and loss will be enough to jolt Deomo into understanding...He is not a creature of destruction..He is his own being, he has a soul and ultimately is the only one to hold dominion over it. *sacrifice*

Brem is another subject...I feel he grew up a lot last night. He had to face his failures and learn by them. It was funny to watch the wave of realization wash over his face as he realized his failure of the trial was much like his failure in rescuing Kimbrya. It as a painful memory to force him to dig up...but I had to turn that knife in his back a bit to make him understand...

Kimbrya faltered...She pushed herself too much. Perhaps me pushing Brem weakened her because of their bond. I have no doubt she lent him her strength. The foolish thing love will make us do *sacrifice*

Personal Entry-The Call to Sacrifice

2004-12-29T13:45:00.000-06:00

The pain was great. The poor creature trembled as it looked at its bloody hands...Frightened, unsure of what is before it...

...Then I wiped my blood from my hands on my thighs. The pain and uncertainty would have to wait. The task before me was too important. She was too important. The blood now flowed freely from my nose, and began to drip from my right ear. Now was not the time to stop and render myself aid. She had to be pushed...pushed to remember, then...pulled back.

The hope was that the deep decent into the painful memory of Lok would force her to slip into the dark depths of her feralness to find solace. Then by exerting my essence across our Tai Shan bond, augmented by my shallow psyonic sense, pull her back...

The pain was awesome...Luckily the pain radiating from my head was able to dull the morbid feeling emanating from my heart...To have to do this to her, to make her remember...

The rope, the knife at her clothes...Her warm naked flesh bound tightly down to the cold basement of the building...Still...She would not go to the place she needed...She needed to be pushed. So I pushed...

She snarled at me as I grabbed her head by her hair, I told her hateful things in a menacing tone. I took my clothes off in hopes that flesh upon flesh would jolt her memory. The the feel of warm skin atop her helpless body would drive her to the feral. *sigh* it worked...

I had to exert all my will to block her from calling to Deomo, calling to another feral in need. Several times I rushed from the room to vomit, always quickly returning...The bleeding continued. I taunted her, I forced her to feel my flesh press against her from behind as she lay bound with her belly to the ground. I took the ultimate dominating stance over her, preparing to enter her...She snarled and she growled. A strained against her deep feral rage, I reach do her via our Tai shan bond. I accepted the pain of her ordeals into my own mind, I bolstered her strength with that of my own. *sacrifice* Then....A single tear fell from my eye.

*SNAP!!!*
A silence...Like one I have never felt...And her face. Her face transitioned to a peacefulness. I....I could not reach to her and hear anything but what was given to me via our Tai Shan bond. She is back, she made the journey down into the blackness, and now surpassed it. She reached out to me concerned, my own blood covering my lower face, hands, and right side of my head.. A managed to stand, only to puke again, and was able to go deploy a droid so I could administer first aid to her. She cut her wrists badly while struggling. We struggled onto our feet and traveled back to the starport. We spoke for awhile aboard my ship, I desperately needed to land and get myself to a medical center. I have heard of those with my gift' flaming out'. I hope.....All I hope is that my TaiShan is now stronger, that our bond is stronger. I love you Scar'let, always remember.
*trust*
*the bond*
*SNAP!!!*
*sacrifice*

Journal Entry- Sacrifice

2004-12-28T08:38:00.000-06:00

Rites....Deomo...Aico.....when will this all end? When will I ever have my own life back?

I was on Dathomire, tempting Deomo to arrest me so that he would be willing to go through the rites. I lost myself in the Feral calling...slaughtering Nightsister Rangers...a surprisingly tough force sensitive foe...They were all too predictable, kill one, leave her for the next to find, kill the new ranger...I wanted to be alone, to fight out this pain i felt from Kimbrya's words...two Tai'Shan? How can the person I have turned my life upside down for, have the same bond with another? Especially him...I have no ill feelings towards the man, but the beast that hides within is a danger. He must learn control. The rites could do that for him...I know what the empire has planned for me...but still it is worth knowing Deomo may learn balance, especially if our paths are destined to keep overlapping....*sacrifice*

I..heard her...and I felt her when she landed....my resolve strengthened and I was instantly pulled form the feral...However, in her effort to come to me, she never made it...she lost herself in the bloodlust, and i went to her...corpses and the flash of her blade greeted me. her Dance of Death is quite a sight to be taken in, but not when she looses herself...she becomes an animal..a lifeless, angry soul intent on only destruction without purpose. Even with our bond, if she was to truely loose herself, I am afraid she would turn on me...that is why she too, must go through the rites. I do not think I could bring myself to take her down. Once she had regained control, I began to speak to her about the Rites. As fate would have it, she was Called by Him...typical....what timing...I tried to warn her that I would not be well received. Deomo and I had exchanged words earlier, it did not go well. We rushed to Dantooine...he was deep in a feral rage...he did not notice me keeping him on his feet as he battled...several times, I almost lost him. In his rage he was wreckless, but seemed...frightened like a wild creature, striking out at anything around it...once the battle calmed, his rage turned to me...for once, because it was the right thing, I backed away...I have never backed away from anything...sometimes, that is the best way to gain the trust of a wild creature, show a hint of fear. What is a little pride anyway? *sacrifice*

I left, and urged Scar'let to follow Deomo, to talk to him...my presecnce only angers him. Apparently they spoke at length in the temple. Eventually the disease Sacrlet was hit with during the battle became too much and she called out to me through our Tai'Shan bond. I was orbiting the planet in my Tie, anticipating the need of my help. I landed and quickly travelled to the temple. In route, Deomo called me on my comm, "Your presecnce is required at the temple." Calm, even...he had...calmed...something had changed...I sensed a darkness in Scarlet's mind, a darkness gained from touching Deomo's necklace. What evil does it contain? Is this from the creatures Kimbrya told me about? Could it all be true? Could Deomo have killed no one?

I spoke with Deomo about the rites, their importance...he seemed distant, yet??? Then he did something that actually caught me off guard, he showed concern, concern for Scarlet and I...then it was all too clear. Kimbrya told him what she told me of Deomo's blood. It holds a close chemical match, the same match that produces our Tai shan bond...I tried to keep it from Scarlet. I did not want her avoiding the Rites to prevent something form happening to our bond. Deomo insisted I tell her...I did and she spiralled into more confusion. the poor creature, she has had to endure so much lately...I do not know why I am compelled to do this, for Deomo...I must know the truth. Two Zabrak bonded makes much more sense then a Zabrak and a human. Perhaps I am the anomoly, the accident...*Fate bites back* Regardless, my love for Scar'let knows no limit. I will see to her well being and happiness, even if it is not destined to be with me. It is the right thing to do...I do not want to let her go but if that is what Fate chooses, then so be it. *sacrifice*

This is why I must do what I have set out too, after the rites, I must...eliminate a threat to everyone. It must be done. Remember my Tai Shan, trust in my love for you, I will never forget... *sacrifice*

Journal Entry- Rites

2004-12-27T10:12:00.000-06:00

I was excited to get the chance to speak with Kimbrya about the rites. I am glad she is better. I see some improvment in her condition but I still worry for her. Trying to get information from her, I am afraid I pushed her too hard. I know I pushed myself too hard, as the headaches have returned...She is physically weak, but her mind...is like no other...I doubt I will 'push' her again. I wish I hadn't. What was discovered struck me deeply. A jagged vibroblade directly into my heart, twisting with joy in the pain it causes...

Besides that painful bit of information, I was able to nail down some specifics of the rites. Along with Kimbrya's help, we are to guide Scar'let, Deomo, and Brem through them. Much to my shock, Deomo not only wants to be led through the rites, he spoke with Kimbrya about this and she told me so. I know he does not fully trust me, and this concerns me, perhaps he will trust another...I will need to contact Cauil. Although their last meeting did not go well, perhaps he would still be willing to help. Kimbrya and I discussed some possible trials. I have...an idea in mind...that may be better...more effective...

How far will I go for my Tai'Shan? Perhaps we will soon find out.

Personal Entry- Twist of Fate

2004-12-24T01:28:00.000-06:00

Apparently I am now considered a threat to the Empire. Why, I do not know. I am considering retiring. Perhaps the Empire is lost in its ways...Unstable officers being placed in charge of battalions. Unseasoned rookies being promoted without proving their worth.

Now, there have been multiple assassins sent to try to take out either myself, or those around me. What is everyone afraid of? What am I in the middle of?

I intercepted positive news regarding Kimbrya's health. She may be able to pull through.

I was able to finally hunt, side by side with my Tai Shan. Along side Envy, she shreeded through squads of Mott Hunters, and Dantari Tribesmen. I picked off the arrent exposed limb with my pistol and applied medic treatment to Scar'let when I could. It was all I could do to remain focus and not just stop and watch her wreck havoc. Pure beauty in an intricate dance of death...

Afterwards we returned to the Temple. she began her meditation for Kimbrya's recovery, and I returned to Yavin 4 to continue my hunt. Once completed, I launched into space and tried out my newly upgraded tie-fighter. Suddenly my comm was polluted by the insecent whining of a lowly creature of a man. A poor excuse of an assassin I suppose...

Mission Report- Subject 0199922- Mission Aborted

2004-12-21T10:30:00.000-06:00

Mission Report
Date 122105
Time 1033 hours
Mission Title: Subject 0199922
Mission Status: Aborted

I regret to inform the Empire that I must abort this mission, and am requesting it be reassigned to another agent.
I will also no longer be needing the assistance of Sgt. Brem Stone either, and am requesting he be reassigned. While he acted up to expectations, officer protocol was lax at times. Due to the unusual nature of my mission he should not be reported for insubordination.

Journal Entry- 'Fraidy Cat

2004-12-20T15:59:00.000-06:00

I think one of the most endearing qualities of Scar'let is for all of her strength and intelligence, there is still a vulnerability. I have seen her stand toe to toe with a dark jedi Sith in the battle on Dantooine. She was the model of power. My pride was overwhelming...to know...that that woman, that Zabrak...that we were one.

Last night at the holiday party in Kintan I saw another side of her. For the first time, she had left the armor and battle dress at home and instead was clothed with an elegant blue dress...I heard her talking outside the cantina, nervous of all the sound coming from within. I left my seat to go out and meet her, to ensure her it was a sfae environment and with me, she could join and see the wonderous shows. She sat at my feet, much as a weary feline would...relaxed enough to take in her surroundings, but constantly scanning the room for a way out. I had to leave the show early and prepare my rancor for the battles and wanted her to stay. She was surrounded by friends but instead chose to stay by my side. She sat mediating under a garden, watching the battles from afar, never stepping too close...not from fear of the monsterous Rancor, but rather, fear of the people...I knew then that she was an answer to all of my questions. Never had I been drawn to another. Never have I been so willing to embrace the unknown. After the battles she sneaked around a corner to change out of her dress, complaining of it feeling unnatural. Using our Tai'shan bond I found her just as she was slipping on her battle shirt...I could not help but smiling to her. I was finally able to give her Koownye, a Guurcat I caught for her...The name means "Remember". I hope she calls to it when she is troubled, and I am not there. I cannot always be there to help her with her trials. Koownye, trained by her Tai'Shan, raised by her Tai'shan...will help her when I cannot.

Journal Entry- First Love

2004-12-20T10:37:00.000-06:00

There have been few in my life, few that have awakened the desire from within to care, to love. My career has not often allowed the luxury to be with another. Duty, responsibilities always have taken precedence over my personal life.

Once, there was a fellow Imperial Officer. I was hunting in the hills of Naboo, on a training mission. I was leading new residents of my town out on a hunting mission to clear out some local Fambaa Packs. Often times these massive creatures would encroach on our city’s boarders. This was a perfect opportunity to help new residents practice their shooting, and scouting skills. Sending my pets to occupy the creatures, throwing Adhesive Mesh traps at them as they attacked, and knocking the creatures down with a well placed pistol whip to the ankle, made the hunt relatively danger free. We had become overwhelmed due to a resident not following orders and were making camp. Suddenly my proximity alarm went off and I readied my weapon to deal with the humanoid threat coming over the hill. It was then that I looked up and saw a woman, strong in statue, black hair flowing down over her shoulders. In her hands were a T21. Not a common weapon to see being wielded by a female. Curious I rode out to meet her. I recognized her as a rifleman in the Imperial Army, and we spoke. Friendly and confident we chatted for a short time before returning to my encampment. I offered for her to join and she soon was standing by my side as I barked orders to the squad, she picked off Fambaas charging an individual hunter. Suddenly one of the giant creatures turned its sights on us. I reached for a trap but soon realized I was out. I tried yelling to Slice but he was busy helping a resident finish off a struggling Fambaa. I turned to her about to suggest we move, when she raised her rifle and brought down the creature before it was even within range of my pistol. I looked at her, searching for an answer to her calm, and surprising strength. She looked into my eyes with those green eyes of her, tilted her head to the side and smiled. Strength and beauty, a rare combination. I saw her from time to time as our paths crossed in both Theed and out in the woods. We both enjoyed the outdoors, and even spent a few evenings on hunts together, just the two of us.
Enjoying our time in the woods, I decided it was time we spent some away from the hunt. I invited her to dinner at my house and hired two friends to play music and dance as we ate and chatted. I picked her up at her house to be shocked at the sight before me. No longer were my eyes taking in the sight of a warrior hoisting around a high powered rifle. What I saw looking down at me from her balcony framed by the setting sun’s light, shamed me…For I felt as if I was not even worthy of being in her presence. I have fought numerous battles against rebels against insurmountable odds, yet for once I was uncertain, and even, slightly afraid. New feelings were manifesting in the hard nosed Imperial Officer, my walls of strength were being torn down by this vision of soft innocence. Knowing the balance to this soft side, made her that much more engaging. I walked up to her and, without words, offered my hand at her doorstep to guide her down the front steps and a short block away to my house. We exchanged pleasantries along the way. I complemented her on her dress, knowing my simple words did no justice to the sight before me. Once we arrive at my house, she was shocked to see two others there. The entertainers were a surprise. She entered my house for the first time. Looking around like a curious animal, she absorbed the sights of my living room, and hunting collection. Near the base of the stairs a simple glass table was set with food for two. The musician positioned himself on the stairs, the dancer began to sway softly to his music on the floor. My eyes never left the creature ahead of me dressed in her gray and black elegant dress. She asked questions of my past, my childhood, my time as mayor. She was most fascinated that I would have the time to be mayor of a city, yet, still be available to help the young resident or new crafter. She had spent time in Mos Eisley, helping farmers recently landed get their feet on the ground. I believe we have a kindred spirit in this. Whether it is to spread the goodwill and influence of the empire, or merely a way for us to pay penance for the death we have caused, helping others has always been a part of our lives. I suppose that is why I became a mayor, and she the Headmistress of her guild. At the evening’s conclusion, we parted with a peck on the cheek. I returned to my house to clean up, looking every so often at the empty chair in which she once sat. It was then, that I decided, love would have to come before duty this one time.

Frequenting cantinas, I had several friends in the entertainment business. One such friend, a giant wookie by the name of Grud, asked me if I would officiate his wedding ceremony at the Lake Retreat. I readily accepted. Apparently there are benefits to being a master politician after all. He said that a tailor of his would provide clothes and to tell me if I will be bringing a date. The next time I saw my hunting partner, she greeted me with a sly smile, something a little different behind those eyes of hers. I could not quite see it but I knew I had to find out. The wedding would be the time. I asked her if she would care too attend and what her dress size was, laughing at the confused look upon her face. On the day of the event I met her in Eden’s Grief, the current city where we separately reside. We took a shuttle to the Lake Retreat and quickly met up with the tailor. I was given an outfitting befitting royalty: gold cloth trimmed in a fine white. She emerged from changing more radiant than ever. We were introduced to many. Never of us being one for big groups, we politely spoke with those around us. During the ceremony it was difficult for me to focus on the task at hand, my eyes shifting to her standing patiently to the side. She seemed to be shifting around uneasily. She had to have known that there were other eyes upon her figure besides mine. As soon as the ceremony was concluded, she walked quickly to my side and smiled. She took my hand into hers and looked at me, a slight gleam in her eye. She commented on what a beautiful ceremony it was. Soon after the congratulations to the new bride and groom were concluded, Grud announced that the guests were invited into the cantina for the reception, but that first, there was an announcement. He stepped aside and motioned to me…I glanced at her quickly and caught her head turning to mine, masked with confusion. I stepped around and stood in front of her. I spoke of the earlier times in which we barely knew each other, and the times we stood side by side fighting in the wild. She looked into my eyes with a certain bit of uncertainty as to what was about to happen. A noticed a small grin break on her face, along with a single tear forming at her eye. I kneeled before her and asked her for her hand in marriage. She reached her hand out to pull me to my feet and whispered the words, “Yes, of course…” The crowd cheered for us, as we bounded into the cantina with the rest of the guests. Side by side, hand in hand.
We were soon married in Eden’s Grief. A good friend, Kasek Zon officiated. I quickly moved into her house, moving my office in as well. It was a blissful time; one which I think back on regularly. We had a child, Avios, before we were married and continue to play a role in his life. Letting this creature go back to the wild may have been the single most critical mistake of my life. I never should have let her go.

Journal Entry- No Map

2004-12-20T09:21:00.000-06:00

So much has happened, the path before me is convoluted. I am drawn to one, but she, is drawn to others...I do not know if she feels as strongly as I do of her, and this pains me. I cannot answer all her 'callings'. She has found a kindred spirit in another for her feral calling. The Otherness also calls her to this person. I am at a loss as to what to do. Normally I would rid myself of these other 'influences'. This would kill her as well for I know she has a caring heart.

Perhaps...Perhaps we need some time apart...Determine what it is we are searching for. I have much to learn, but am afraid I am too late. My only guide has fallen ill and will soon leave this world. Without her I am afraid all will be lost. I will be lost...

Maybe I should turn myself in to the Imperial Medical Staff that wants to run tests on me. I don't know anymore.

Personal Entry- subject #0199922

2004-12-17T10:05:00.000-06:00

Upon initial infiltration, the subject was extreemly unstable, quick to anger. It is quite clear that the only thing keeping him in check was his loyalty to his commanding officer. No that the commanding officer is absent, I fear that the control may be slipping. An agent is in place observing and reporting. I fear for the agent's safety, but the risk was known when the assignment was taken...This...agent's skills are not easily surpassed...I should know...

Lately outside influences seem to be interacting with the subject. I have seen confusion, and even fear at what he may become....also, hope. Perhaps there is hope for this one and the agent will not have to be given the order to take the subject out. My initial mission objective was to analyze the target...perhaps, I can help the target. I have done much research into the target's background, psych eval, medical history....and feel that there is a genuine chance of redemption. the subject has commited multiple atrocities, and normally would have already been....dealt with...

Journal Entry- 121604

2004-12-16T13:59:00.000-06:00

I remember once, watching a puppeteer in the streets of Coronent entertain some children. He was momentarily distracted and the strings got tangled. He tried to correct them but he ended up tripping over his own feet and stumbling to the ground. I had to give him a soft chuckle as I waited for my informant to come from the cantina. How alike my life is with that of the puppeteer. Except I do not tangle my strings...until now...

Control is only an illusion. I thought I had it, but I see it slipping through my fingers.

Images of death, destruction, and carnage dance in my mind...then the headaches, and bleeding. The only peace I had found was the smell of blood of my victims on my creatures' fangs and burning flesh caused by my FWG5. Lately, another has brought peace to my soul through a bond I barely understand. it is not just love, it is...beyond that. I have loved few in my time, but enough to recognize it. This is new to me, forgein, and frightening...This...this Zabrak, this Rebel Zabrak, can.. call to me, I can sense her being, I can feel her pain. I feel her fear, and the need from within me to reach out to her, to be with her. For she is my Tai'Shan, one body, mind, and spirit...I love her without knowing why. I fear this...dependence, yet have embraced it...I fear she does not yet trust me though. This pains me to no end. There have been times when she has looked at me with fear in her eyes...and this srikes me right through my heart to my soul. Without her, all will be lost, I would have nothing. for I feel she is my Only...without her, I will be left to decend into the dark emptiness that fights its way out of me everyday.

Now, I fear the Empire has turned its eyes on me. I do not know what is contained within my soul. So many things are in conflict. During my Imperial Training, I became proficient in bending one's mind to my own will. Not by a simple Jedi trick, but rather, by coersion and manipulation. Now, my Dejarik board has been upturned.

OOC-Important-read re: new posting rules

2004-12-15T12:01:00.000-06:00

For those that are just trolling, thank you and ignore the following....

This is intended for the other players in-game...

I find I need to write thoughts of Maxell, that cannot be used in-game. The intent is to provide a resource as to what Maxell is thinking, to be used by other players...This will generally answer those ooc questions in-game. At times I may refer someone to a specific entry.

All will be notated and titled appropriatly. All generic comm messages will be of a lower security level, then the Personal Entries...the personal entries would have to be hacked to view. The new classification will be journal entry. these are contained in a book that usually resides in my house, but I may have it on my person from time to time..for ic purposes, should i be killed, it can be taken and read, assuming it is on my person, and my corpse is searched.

Personal Entry- Love, Zabrak Species

2004-12-15T08:58:00.000-06:00

*laughs* I understand neither of them. Both are unpredictable, yet can yeild such wonderful rewards...so much has changed over the last several days...and much more is on the horizon...

Tai'Shan- *smiles* I have neither felt nor heard of anything as strong as the bond I have to this one Zabrak. I would go to the ends of the universe for her, and burn to the ground anyone that would wish her harm. We are, linked, yet we know nothing of each other. She does not, know of my history, my desires, or my intentions. No longer are they malicious towards the ones she loves. For they are as much a part of her as her soul. I see great strength in those eyes. However oftens it is shrouded with fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of the calling of the wild, the feral, and fear of our inexplicable bond.

Brem- Brem is troubled by what lies over the horizon for him...interestingly enough, he has a human Tai'Shan as well, yet she has fallen ill. There were, complications during the last cloning process. I fear for her life and the result it will have on Brem. I sense...perceive a darkness about him. Normally, he would have already taken his last breath. His bond to my Tai'Shan prevents me from eliminating my problem, and now I must trust him as she does.

Deomo- I pity him. I have learned an interesting fact about his training in the Imperial Military...At times Zabrak are born with a mild genetic mutation, on the cellular level, that manifests itself in abnormally aggressive behavior. It is the Zabrak way to either abort these children post delivery or complete a set of rites to learn to control the calling. My Tai'shan contains this strain as does...Deomo...my Tai'Shen was taken from her home and hidden in a temple with monks that raised her. It appears the Empire realized Deomo contained the strain, and began to set plans in motion to clear his path towards us. The empire apparently had developed a way to implant a devic.....*****

***incoming comm message***
**priority urgent**
*From: Imperial Medical Staff, Theed, Naboo*

Message:
Maxell Snow, you are hereby ordered to report immediatly to the nearest Imperial Authority in order to be escorted safely to us. It is imperative that you comply with this directive. should you choose not to, we will be forced to contact the local authorities for your IMMEDIATE arrest.

***end message***

Personal Entry- Brem...a Thorn to be Removed

2004-12-12T15:41:00.000-06:00

Brem....the foolish child...does not know when....to shut up...if Deomo has the same access codes I do then all is lost, Deomo will complete his decent to this unknown inner beast that threatens him. Deomo must be made to know what is happening...he must understand...what is happening to him...Zabrak...the feral...he must control it for the sake of himself, and the Empire...or all will be lost...

He could...smell her on me...I know who he seeks, and it kills me...the...feelings, the bond...I want it to end...I want to...kill...*nose begins to bleed*

She reaches to him though, and I do not know why...she has asked me to trust, and trust I will. she may be able to help him...to realize...what she fights...I feel it in her too...the anguish, the pain...the hate...for a brief instant, when she looked into my eyes on my ship...it was gone...nothing but contentment, and calmness radiated from her...the release...

he needs a release besides killing, or his own death...he must see past his unfound rage for me...my fight with him is over...for her...she must do this, for all our sake's...

Mission Report: Broken Will- Mission Complete

2004-12-12T11:09:00.000-06:00

Mission Report
Date 121205
Time 1115 hours

Mission Title: Broken Will
Mission Status: Complete-Final Report

Through my contact with multiple persons involved with the temple, it is my conclusion that the temple poses no threat to the Empire. It is of a peaceful nature and is based on a belief that rites of passage for all species can be exhibited together. It is a place to bring species together, not ideals. Rebel contriband was found in the basement but was part of a room dedicated to a fallen rebel friend of the priestess. It is a shrine in rememberance, nothing more.

It is believed that aggression against this temple will result in a small scale war, with no end in sight. Locals are protective of the temple and what peace it provides them. Commiting cultural genocide by erasing this temple will anger local guilds. The Empire needs Dantooine to remain stable, and in their control as it is now.

I have concern of one commander of a guild. There have been reports of a coordinated effort to sweep and clear all rebel cells on Dantooine. While admirable, such a policy will ignite cells elsewhere. I have first-hand information that this commander personally seeks two members of this temple for his own reasons. It is believed he is under no directive from the Empire to do so. If he is successful I am afraid Dantooine will be lost to us...

-End Mission Report

Official Comm.- Imperial Medical Staff

2004-12-12T11:00:00.000-06:00

From: Imperial Medical Staff- Theed
To: Agent Maxell Snow

Re: Blood Sample Submitted

It is imperative that you meet with the specialists in th Bestine Medical Center as soon as possible. Blood contagen has been identified and poses a significant risk to your person. Please comply with this directive.

Personal Entry- Calm Before the Storm

2004-12-11T18:20:00.000-06:00

Finally...realization to what has been happening has enveloped me like her warm embrace..so very frightened yet, finally at peace she was. The vastness of space offering up a refuge for the both of us...away from the sounds, the smells...the death and hate...we held each other and became one...One mind, body, and spirit..

Soon after the clarity brought with it much concern..What mind set have I been in until now? What has happened in my 'absence'?

Personal Entry-Pain, Confusion

2004-12-09T11:57:00.000-06:00

The headaches keep coming but now, they do not arrive alone. An overwhelming feeling of being 'lost, troubled, confused' keeps washing over me. My only defense is to mask the weakness with the other overwhelming feelings I have had as of late...revenge, destruction, chaos...Maybe being cooped up in my house because of this minor nosebleed and blood abnormality is beginning to affect me. I need to get out, stretch my legs, let my animals run free a bit, let them...kill a bit...Perhaps we will travel to Dantoo...no
perhaps Yavin 4..Why would I feel the need to go....

Something is wrong with me, but I do not know what. I may have to relinquish this mission to someone else. But how can I? I would have no influence on who would take my place. I cannot imagine if it was handed to a bloodthirsty Imperial who's answer for everything is death...Not everything can be learned from post-mortem analysis. Cloning is such a touchy prospect as well. Something always seems to be lost. Take for example Scar'let...I have never witnessed such an adverse reaction to being cloned. Perhaps it has something to do with what happened right before she was struck down. At such close range my comm-tap was acting up but I heard 'that' voice. I do not know what he was saying, but whatever it was, sent Scar'let into a frenzied panic. In her haste she bolted, and ran right into a squad of Stormtroopers. Those mindless bastards, too stupid to realize she was in shock from fear...They gunned her down before I could get to her...I cussed them out slapped them around. One, I did not notice has rank, and fined me. I had thought I outranked all of the Stormtroopers. Oh well, I suppose the requisition for the AT-ST will have to wait. Never again will a Stormtrooper talk to me so.if only he knew what I was capable of...only I wasn't bound by my self-restraint..He could have found out...

I find my thoughts consumed with the life of one, and the death of another. I am trying all I can to keep one alive, while the other tries to reverse engineer all my efforts. He normally would be dealt with in a manner most befitting the lowly creature that he is, but this is not an easy prospect considering he is attached to the hip of a Colonel in the Imperial Navy... Does not says much for the Colonel but he seems to realize what this person represents, and the instability demonstrated.

Kimbrya will be released from the hospital soon. Unfortunately, my mind is in no shape to question her. So out of focus...I hesitate to expose myself to such trauma while I am in this condition. Poor girl...I will discover what part she plays in this. She needs time with Brem...they are..I think it is called Tr'ansian, or something. From the minimal research I have completed, this seems to be a life-bond of sorts, normally between two Zabrak. Curious that this seems to have manifested itself between a Zabrak and a human. I know of only one instance of this happening before...if this is occurring again, I will have to report it to the...no, not here...I doubt my logs are impervious to the prying eyes of a curios Colonel. Good day to you Colonel Cauil, here's hopes to you being able to curb your dog and my path never crossing with his.

Comm Msg to Imperial Medic Staff- Theed

2004-12-08T12:30:00.000-06:00

Update on information requested...

The blood sample has been transmitted to your location. Initial scans indicated an unkwown bio-chemical. Medical Libraries produce no results...

Could this be cause of the bleeding from the nasal passage and the headaches?

Please advise, mission completion in jeapordy due to physical limitations.

Personal Entry- Uncertainty

2004-12-08T10:17:00.000-06:00

I am afraid I have become too close. Things are happening that I cannot explain, nor do I understand. I need to distance myself and regroup. I need to understand what is going on...

I cannot allow myself to loose focus on my mission. I cannot let my fee..thoughts get in the way of my goal...

Something very unsettling happened last night...After meeting with Cauil, I tracked Scar'let down. She is in awful shape, feral, barely remembering...I tr...I try to help her remember, to feel...but I just do not know how.

...the bleeding has begun again...My head is pounding and I cannot think straight...I am scared of playing with something that I am so unsure of. I do not know what is going on with my mind or why I fee....seem to find Scar'let so easily...Last night was especially worrisome...I tracked her down, and while talking to her, I glanced down to my homing receiver. It wasn't even on...How did I know where to go?...dammit...*wipes blood from his nose*

I had to call Brem to her in hopes that his history would bring her back. Something seems to be wrong...he seems...hesitant of me, almost fearful...I hope that he does not do anything stupid...he is critical to Kimbrya's recovery, and Scar'let's sanity...I cannot afford his death...

I had to make a deal with devil last night. I am heart broken to discover that Cauil may be as mindless as Deomo. That is troublesome. He says one thing, but his men do another...I do not think he considers his actions' impact on the conflict as a whole...look how many rebel guilds have begun to band together...I am afraid Cauil has inadvertently swung the balance of power in Radiant. There are Imperials that are unhappy with SSS's actions, and rightly so... A couple of good things did arise out of the meeting...he has promised that Deomo will no longer torment Scar'let...I am not...I do not know why I insisted on that...I would like to think it is because she is my only reliable contact to Kimbrya, but this nagging feeling...I don't know... Also SSS no longer considers me a traitor. That will make travel a bit easier...I can shut down a few unregistered safe houses. Regardless of what Cauil says I cannot share all my information with him. I would trust him in a battle but not on this playing field. There is a reason I was not on the firing range, and stuck in a classroom with my head in psychology books. All those damn psy ops classes...the skills come in handy, and luckily, I haven't had to tap the darker methods taught to us...I will never forget the scream in that one class...I wonder if that poor girl ever recovered...To be awarded top honors in that class was bitter sweet. It has been a long time...perhaps I should not fall out of practice....I wonder what Deomo is doing tonight? *wicked grin as he shuts his comm down*

Personal Entry-Survivability of Protectors

2004-12-07T12:37:00.000-06:00

Last night I tracked down Scar'let and was lucky enough to find Brem there as well. I took the opportunity to assess and evaluate their skills, and found them lacking. Brem seemed to be much of a novice, and had a tendency to rush in. This was also demonstrated by his rash decision to storm SSS for Kimbrya. While Scar'let seemed to be the much better fighter, she too was overly ambitious and had a tendency to fight none stop, almost to the point of falling out in sheer exhaustion. I worry about her.

I do not understand what is going on between Scar'let and I, and quite honestly, I am scared of it. Not much can scare me, especially not Cauil or his lapdog Deomo. I must admit, I do have a unique respect for Cauil. He is just doing his mission with the tools assigned to him. Deomo is not much use except for fear, torture, and death. That is why I am hesitant in trusting Cauil when Deomo is around. Deomo indicates one thing, someone is going to die or hurt. I plan on doing neither at the hands of any of them.

SSS is a prime example of the schism that many of us have noticed forming from within the Empire. One side, the blood thirsty, win at any cost mentality. Other guilds I have noticed like this are MALAS and RELIC. They do nothing but strengthen the Rebels by handing them new recruits and martyrs.

I am not like them, but I also want a conclusion to this conflict. Succumbing to the requests of the terrorist Rebels is not an option. Lowering my actions to their level is not an option. Death of innocents is not an option...I hope that I do not discover any of the contacts i have made are nothing more than innocents. Believing in the rebellion's cause is one thing, raising a weapon to the Imperial next to is another...That is unless that Imperial is Deomo... or others like him...

I pity Cauil. He is in a tough position and does not know it.

Personal Entry- Fate's Circle

2004-12-06T13:44:00.000-06:00

I was messing around my newly built house, finally unpacking when a thought popped into my head. I do not know why but I felt something, and without knowing set my comm to dial one of my marks in my investigation, Scar'let. she was hiding in the middle of a battle in Theed. Apparently she had foolishly rushed in to help a friend in need. What she hadn't expected was to come face to face with Deomo, Cauil's mindless enforcer. She somehow escaped his sight and whispered to me through her comm, very frightened...For her safety I had her come to my yet to be furnished house in Hendola, just to rest for a second, and possibly to acquire some of the informaion I seek. She was still very frightened and slinked away from the slightest touch. So much like a wild swamp cat, or gurrcat she was...shrinking away...glancing around nervously...

Then the unthinkable happened...Like a common criminal, two Imperials came knocking at my door...Funny, Cauil claims all he wanted to do was chat, unlikely with his enforcer standing there, with that gleam in his eye. Cauil proposed a meeting at the retreat, in front of the inquisitor, to determine who is lying. I really see no point in this as I am hiding nothing from him besides my true mission. He is too proud to realize that the Empire may have considered he would fail and assigned an alternate solution...Kimbrya knows something, she knows something of the Force and the old ways...SSS was unable to extract the information through force, and their laziness allowed an escape attempt, and her execution. Now she is so mentally damaged due to the abuse she suffered at the hands of Deomo and the loss of her child, we may never know the truth...

I have finally completed my collection of DNA samples in order to protect my mission from SSS and their carelessness. Kimbrya, a strand of hair caught in a bush during her transport, from Brem a tissue sample left behind after one of his training fights on Dantooine, from Scar'let a tear shed...

I wonder about Scar'let's part in all of this. She seems to be a central figure but in actuality she is so fragile and vulnerable. She really is an enigma...I feel he......there is something about her I cannot put my fingers on...almost an animalistic need, hunger...it is odd, she seems feral at times, yet, is highly intelligent. I must study the Zabrak race a bit more closely. Every other time I have encountered one, the situauation has been far from pleasant. Most have had to die, or have the mark of death on them now.

I rather enjoyed my time with Scar'let. She has a unique beauty about her that I find myself drawn too. Perhaps in another life. The dangers that lay ahead for her and her friends, as well as my own neck do not provide a reasonable chance of something to develop. At any rate it would not be fair to her or others. I do not know where my heart is these days...I see it drawn to the image of a red haired beauty holding a rifle and looking out across the hills of Naboo for her qurry...but choices were made that may have lost that image for ever. One doesn't know...

Personal Entry: re: mission Broken Will

2004-12-04T18:38:00.000-06:00

I wish I knew what I have been pulled into the middle of...On one side, a seemingly innocent child of a female, on the other side, what appears to be a bloodthirsty pack of rouge Imperials. I have been tasked with completing the mission that they failed. Amazing that a crew that size could not hold on to a single girl. This leads me to believe that there may be more to her than first expected. Maybe the empire is correct in wanting to discover what she knows.

I have retraced the path of destruction the SSS clan, led by Caucil left. They were sloppy in their work, and undoubtedly are blaming me for the failure. They did not trust nor believe me. In fact they even threatened to arrest me...

I have visited the temple on Naboo and Dantooine, and spoke with Scar'let, a seemingly benevolent priestess of some sort. She is helping Kimbrya, for what reason, I do not know. There is an odd history among all of them: Kimbrya, Scar'let, and Brem. Their paths to the hearts seem to cross. I must learn more of what Kimbrya knows. I do not trust Brem to protect her either. He is young and makes foolish mistakes. I will have to do what I can from a distance, for the sake of all of them, and my own neck.

I do not think she is a threat. She should not have been demoralized and beaten as she was either. While I know of her location and whom she is with, I cannot report it to my surperiors. There is no telling where SSS has allies.

Mission Assignment -Finish Broken Will

2004-12-04T17:24:00.000-06:00

Date: 120404
Time 17:30

Mission- Complete Mission Broken Will

Mission Broken Will Status: Failed

Mission: Complete Mission Broken Will by any means necessary.

Goals: Assess and report all intel on the temples found on Naboo on Dantooine. Use any means necessary. Work with no one. With the apparent failure of the SSS guild, the empire is concerned of a leak from within.

Mission Report- Rouge Guild

2004-12-04T11:33:00.000-06:00

Report Title: Mission Summary of Observation of Prisoner Transport
Report Date: 120304 1100 hours
Officer Reporting: Maxell Snow

It is now believed that SSS is a rouge guild within the Empire. During the prisoner transport of Kimbrya, their leader, Cauil purposely misled me and eventually threatened to arrest me. He sent a comm message saying that the prisoner was now at the Talus Imperial Base. Unbeknownst to him, I had already landed and was watching them from a distance. As I listened to his message I watched as they moved her out of the base and into an outlying town. I doubt it was the Inquisitor's or Lord Vader's intent to have a bunch of thugs and bounty hunters question the prisoner, but I am certain that is what has happened. I do not know what harm has come to her or the prisoner's current status. I was forced to leave upon being threatened with arrest. Their numbers were just too many.

Conclusion: SSS is a danger to the Empire and themselves. It is my opinion that they must be dealt with swiftly and permanently.

End Report...

Background

2004-12-03T20:14:00.000-06:00

All subsequent posts will be in the 1st person....

Maxell was raised on Coronet, but quickly left home to make a life for himself. He found a new home in Keren, on Naboo. He quickly opened up a shop in the middle of a pocket of buildings outside of the city limits. Business was well, he was one of the few merchants around. Maxell made a good amount of money, or at least what was considered good before inflation got out of hand. One of his customers soon recruited Maxell into their Imperial guild, 58TH regiment. He soon became their weaponsmith and managed their guild mall.

When the Empire decided to initiate further colonization of planets, and allow additional cities, his guild moved to Dantooine. Maxell remained to recruit and manage the mall. He soon opened up a merchant tent in the newly formed town of Eden's Grief to sell his weapons. Business was god and his neighbors were friendly and welcomed him with open arms. He was even invited to the town's guild meeting. Maxell respectfully declined an invitiation to the guild and instead, formed his own guild, GODZ. Shortly after, the city began to drop into disarray. The mayor was always gone and no one was taking responsibility. Maxell decided the right thing to do was to step up and offer to run for mayor. His offer was accepted by the major guild of the city, and after only one failed attempt, Maxell became mayor of Eden's Grief. After a log tenure, Maxell met, and married a Master Ranger named Ebe Lightcloud, former head mistriss of the BABES PA. The stress of his job, and with Ebe constantly hunting, their relationship was strained and they divorced. They had a child, Avios Snow, and by a wuirk of fate, Ebe is Maxell's imperial squadron commander.

Maxell decided he was finally done with the city. Too many complainers and not enough contributors...He decided to move out and many of the contributors followed. They formed a new guild, called Sphere of Influence. Maxell co-leads the guild with Kasek Zon, a musician.

Their guild now resides in Hendola on Naboo.

Maxell Snow is an officer in the Imperial Navy, and a pilot for the Inquisitor.